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Under the radar touch-technique to build a connection with any guy

Have you ever been in a situation with a guy where you wanted to build a connection, but you were around other people?

If you missed this clip from Ready For Love, it’s been getting more attention than almost any other scene so far. Check it out…

–I was around friends and so I couldn’t talk with him…

–I was with work colleagues and there was NO WAY I wanted to be seen flirting…

–He was in a group, and I didn’t want to face that kind of pressure…

You can have your excuses, or you can have the guy, but you can’t have both.

In the video I walk through a simple yet effective way to build a connection with a guy that flies under the radar of anyone around you.

It’s something we call ‘misdirection’ and it involves directing your energy and attention to one person, while building up a physical connection with someone else in the group with a light touch.

Everyone around you will assume you’re just talking with the person you’re facing, and so this technique should help you overcome excuses that may otherwise be holding you back.

Misdirection and non-verbal communication are topics I really explore in detail in my online home-study course The Man Myth. To get more ideas for how to do this, and how to eliminate the excuses that are holding you back, check out the programme today for just $29.95.


To catch up on all of the latest episodes of Ready For Love, head over to NBC.com

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75 Replies to “Under the radar touch-technique to build a connection with any guy”

  • When I first saw this on Ready For Love I had to hit rewind. I really like that it is so under the radar.

  • Hey Matt,since i joined to you website i couldn’t stop reading your amazing tips..thats really works with me. i can’t wait to get more tips from you. HAVE A GOOD DAY

  • Oh my goodness, I’ve totally done this before but it didn’t work out! I think the guy I was misdirecting seemed creeped out by it after clearly avoided me the rest of the night. What am I doing wrong?

    Also, how do you do this in a work situation? I know I’m attracted to a guy there but I only get to see him there and that puts me at a bit of a disadvantage doing something like this anywhere NEAR the building!

    1. Hey Daryn,

      If it’s done right people won’t be freaked out. The less well you know someone the quicker the touch should be. If you know someone better you can leave your hand there.

      As for the workplace, you can still be tactile, just do it in a fluid way that matches your conversation. When touch is done right people barely notice you are doing anything at all, and even if they do it feels natural and comfortable. Just don’t go touching anywhere TOO sexual during work hours lol.


      1. I agree. When someone first touches me I feel a bit surprised, it catches me off guard but if they leave their hand there for too long it gets uncomfortable. I’ve had this happen before and I found myself bending my back and maneuvering to get his hand away. I’d say the safe way to do this is to leave it there just long enough to surprise him and maybe even enough to feel your warmth but not enough to where he has time to shift away. Particularly when you’ve only known him for a little while.

        As far as the lower back is concerned, it feels weird to me to do so to a guy but a hand on the shoulder or arm I won’t have a problem with.

  • Hi,Matt.I love getting mail from you.Amazing,realistic tips that can blow ones mind away.I am attracted to someone in annother city from my self.We communicate by texting and speaking to each other occassionally.I am not sure how to keep him interested in me because of distance and his text basically greets me by a HI,nothing more.I want to keep him interested and open up to me.How do I do this?

    1. Hey Freeda,

      It’s tough when you aren’t in close proximity to someone, because seeing someone in person and flaunting the best parts of yourself is the most effective way of increasing attraction. You can only do so much through calling and texting.

      If anything, I would try to skype him or get him on the phone, so that you can build more of a connection. Texting is only going to get you so far.

      Speak soon!


  • OMG, this is truly effective. I can see that Tracy is seduced and soooooooooooooooooooo into as we all are :)))

  • Hey…. Ive been getng ur mail and the tips are preety amazing… Me and my guy are living in two differnt cities…. Long distance realtion…. And it becomes realy difficult for us to meet… N now most of the time i have to remind him that even i exist… I said him dat we should move on but he is not letng me… What shud i do… Help…:'(

    1. Hey Sheetal,

      If he’s not giving you what you want you have to move on. But don’t expect him to make it easy for you. You have to step up and have the courage to leave even when someone is playing with your emotions. We’re all here to support you through it : )


      1. @Sheetal

        I’ve been reading Get the Guy and thought you might like this quote:
        “All of these attitudes lead a woman to obligate herself prematurely to someone who doesn’t yet deserve her focus.”

        I have done this… Let go… You’ll feel better without the misery. Focus on what you want to do in your life. What’s your goals?

        From one girl to another :)

        Thanks Hussey … I haven’t done so good on this aspect, but I am learning from it. It helps to have you in our lives.. ;)

  • LOVE THIS! Always works ;)

    Matt, you do know you’re going to have women everywhere coming up and rubbing your back now, don’t you? haha wish I could meet you in Seattle, make sure to go to the Pike Place Fish Market and upload a video of you catching one of the fish! If you youtube it, you will understand what I mean haha have a great week!

  • Hi Matt,

    So sat opposite a cute guy on the train home tonight and couldn’t think of anything to start an interaction! How do you start something when there’s nothing to start with?!?


  • You always have something insightful and smart to say during the group discussions…. Arguably the main reason I watch the show! It’s amazing to hear what you know and how well you communicate it. Tonight’s butterfly analogy was great! I think it was a very eloquent way to express something many of us sometimes forget. Wish you the best!

    PS. Congratulations on the best seller (I love watching your videos, it’s incredible how close it brings you to your followers)

  • Hey Mattew! I think you are so baller and brilliant =) How do I sign up for your email tips? Could you please add my email to your list? xoxo Hope to meet you someday

  • Hello Matt :)
    I can’t watch the video ..it refused to work
    I need this so bad …please help ! :(

  • Very nice of you to give such a handful tips on the show not to mention also writing comments on these women’s post here.

    I’m interested in this guy that I met online but it’s hard to make something to happen because we live different cities (5 hr driving distance) I should just move on, right?

  • It’s hilarious- a guy did it on me recently in India, and it made me think of you Matt. It’s ever so subtle, but a popular move for a smooth guy haha!

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