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Men And Commitment

What Our Parents Forgot To Tell Us About Falling In Love

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*WARNING: STRONG LANGUAGE AND MAN TIED UP!*

Watch this video first, the whole way through, then check out my article below for why I think hidden within it is one of the most important lessons we can learn for our love lives.

I can’t remember a single relationship I’ve ever had which didn’t hurt at some point. The hurt that comes from an argument where things are said that are hard to take back. The hurt that comes from feeling jealous, feeling like I somehow wasn’t enough. The hurt that comes from missing someone when they go away, even for a day or two. The hurt that comes from worrying you might lose someone. [Read more…] about What Our Parents Forgot To Tell Us About Falling In Love

The Romantic “Leap Day” Pact

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When your calendar clicks over to February 29th this Wednesday, take a moment to relish the sight of this special date, a number you won’t find in your calendar again for another four years.

This Wednesday is a Leap Day, that rare occasion where the Gregorian calendar sneaks an extra day into the year, bumping us up to 366 days instead of the usual 365.

What’s more, this mysterious extra day goes hand in hand with a romantic tradition. According to an old Irish legend, St. Patrick made a pact with St. Bridget that on a leap day women should be allowed to propose to men – a modest concession for the rights of women perhaps – but nevertheless, at GetTheGuy we see St. Bridget as a pioneer of the message we have been spreading for the last 4 years: Women NEED to get more PRO-ACTIVE when it comes to finding happiness in love!

Sometimes romance needs more than a little push from the heavens; sometimes it needs a colossal kick up the backside from your sharpest-toed stilettos!

Why modern dating advice is holding every woman back

This leap year is for women everywhere. Women who are fed up with crappy advice that tells them to wait around for the perfect man to come and carry them off forever. We read this advice all the time. The kind of advice that tells us that any real prince charming should be so madly in love with you at first sight, that he’ll make all the moves, all the advances, and all you’ll have to do is be your pretty little self and wait for him to top it all off by requesting your hand in marriage and whisking you off into the sunset on his white horse.

And if he fails to see all of that in you from first sight, well hey, screw him, guess he wasn’t that into you in the first place.

Yet, why is it that advice books for women never assume the simple truth about men. Like, the fact that every man finds it the most difficult of all to speak to the women they are attracted to? Or the fact that he’s absolutely terrified of you rejecting him front of his friends? Or that (heaven forbid) he’s shy and desperately wants to find any excuse to meet you?

No, it can’t be any of that stuff. If he really wanted you, he would make the effort, right? Best wait some more.

So we wait…and wait…and wait… [Read more…] about The Romantic “Leap Day” Pact

How To Get Him To Commit – Changing His Mind For The Better

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Trying to get a guy to commit can seem like an almost impossible task for many women. The more you push, the more he resists, and so you’re left dumbstruck as what to do.

I remember back to a time when I was casually seeing a girl, but I had just got out of a long-term relationship and had no intentions whatsoever or being in a relationship with her (or anyone else for that matter).

But I must have seen her about 7 or 8 times, and it got to the point, in mind at least, where questions were starting to arise as to what we were doing together and what the situation was between us.

Being a naive, but caring guy, I decided to be upfront about it

I was so adamant that a relationship wasn’t the right thing for me, I felt the need to express this to her, even though I really liked her (I wanted to be single, but I didn’t want to lead her on).

Dropping her off outside her apartment after another night together, I told her everything on my mind; that I wanted to keep seeing her, that I really liked her, but that I couldn’t fully commit to another relationship right now.

I had played this over in my mind a thousand times before actually telling her, and every time I did, I expected her to be angry, upset and vexed.

But it turns out that this was the perfect opportunity for her to demonstrate how high-value a woman she was. After I’d finished, she turned to me and said, “I wasn’t asking you to marry me!” – immediately making me feel like a complete idiot for having put so much thought into what was essentially just a few casual dates.

Get A Guy To Commit By Using Emotions To Topple Logic

I really didn’t know how to react to this, and driving home I couldn’t get her off my mind. She didn’t care if we were in a relationship or not. She was so relaxed and unfazed with her response that it only made me want her more!

This attitude of hers, coupled with her busy schedule, left me rarely seeing her – making it very clear to me that if I wanted to be with her, I had to actually make a commitment.

She was the only thing on my mind for days, and now the more I’m thinking about her, the more I want to be her.

It doesn’t matter how much I can logically tell myself at this point that I don’t want to be in a relationship – I want to be with her. And it’s very, very hard to fight emotions with logic.

And so about a week later, we’re in a relationship – One which lasted several years

Now you might be thinking that for this article I’ve just decided to reminisce about an ex. But I use this example, even though things didn’t work out between us, as there are so many things to pick up on for women who want to get a guy to commit…

  • Be patient with the early stages of a relationship
  • Never pressure a guy into making a decision by giving him an ultimatum
  • If a guy tells you he doesn’t want to be in a relationship – don’t react to it
  • Make a guy realize that if he wants the best from you, he has to make a commitment

If right now you’re finding it hard getting a guy to commit, follow these four rule, and I assure you that he’ll be yours before you know it.

When it comes to getting a guy to commit, the more natural and congruent you are, the more you will ‘click’ with the guys that you’re seeing.

So now you know the basics of getting him to commit, it’s crucial you know what to do once you’re in a relationship…

This means using proven dating tips that work with almost all men and help to sustain the attraction, to the point where you never loose that spark together. In my FREE newsletter I show you some of the most cutting edge techniques for meeting, attracting and keeping your ideal guy. So sign up today and get instant access, and you’ll be reading the first newsletter within minutes.

What Men Like In A Relationship – Take Note Ladies!

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So you’re probably wondering what men like in a relationship…

Are we really that bad when it comes to relationships?… Any man reading this might hate me for agreeing with you, but yes, when it comes to relationships, we really are that bad.

But it’s not entirely our fault…

Whilst a lot of dating advice and popular opinion attributes this behaviour to male genetics; blaming the old extra Y-chromosome for all the broken hearts out there – this isn’t entirely the case.

Perhaps a bigger problem is giving men this identity. Our society basically leads men to grow up thinking that on a biological, genetic level, they are predisposed to want multiple sexual partners.

This conditioning is coupled with TV shows and Films telling guys how much potential their life has… so long as they’re single. And so men (particularly younger men) tend to keep themselves single believing that they can have the crazy parties and wild nights that they’ve seen on the screens.

The Male Blueprint

It’s this type of social conditioning that I like to refer to as ‘the male blueprint’, and it’s basically a rough psychological roadmap to the 21st century man’s love life.

Being brought up seeing fictional role models like James Bond on the big screen and Vinnie Chase on the TV set, who can blame guys for thinking they’d be better off single? Men are basically programmed from the time that they can speak, to think that they can have so much more fun, freedom and excitement if they keep their options open.

Men will tirelessly pursue this fantasy for years before realizing that they’ve wasted them.

And for most, it’s not until around the age of thirty where this realization really kicks in.

And even then there are countless guys who are still trying to live like James Bond.

And knowing what men like in a relationship isn’t always enough. You’ve really got to be strong in your approach to a relationship with a guy, as if you give him everything he wants too soon, you’ll end up being used and taken for granted.

Getting Him To Commit

So a mistake that a lot of women make, even knowing what men like in a relationship, is giving it all away too soon. If you’re giving a guy your full, undivided attention, and you’re rearranging your schedule to accommodate him, giving everything you have, there is no incentive for him to actually commit to you.

I remember that a few years ago in my life, I was at a point where getting into another relationship was the last thing on my mind. I thought there was nothing anyone could do to convince me otherwise, and I was planning on at least a few years of being single. But then I met someone. And the more things developed between us, the less I saw of her. But every time I did see her things got better. Every time I met her there was something new and exciting, and it got to the point where I just couldn’t stand seeing her so infrequently. I had to commit, and when I did, that’s when things got even better.

I’m not saying that you need to start playing “hard to get.” Rather you need to be a high-value woman. Show a guy that the more he commits, the better things get. And the less he commits, the less frequently he gets to see you (but when he does see you, it still has to be amazing).

What Men Like When In A Relationship…

When you’re actually in a relationship, it can be so easy to slip into a routine. This might be in terms of the places we go, the conversations we have or even our sex lives. And that’s why it’s so important to add variety to everything you do, and never get settled with doing the same thing.

There is nothing more attractive than a multi-dimensional woman; someone who can be funny one minute, then serious the next (and playful all the while in between.) Keep showing different sides to your personality, so that he could never guess what’s coming.

If you feel that things are starting to fall into a rut, ask yourself, ‘what did we do differently when we first started going out?’

This should give you some idea of where you’re getting a little lazy.

Even when you’re in a relationship, you should both be having as much fun seducing each other as you were when you first started going out. And most importantly, don’t forget to flirt! Tease each other, send him a naughty text, and just keep him on his toes.

So there you have it – what men like when it comes to a committed relationship.

When it comes to dating men, the more natural and congruent you are, the more you will ‘click’ with the guys that you’re seeing.

So now you know what men want in a relationship, it’s crucial to keep him on his toes…

This means using proven dating tips that work with almost all men and help to turn the attraction up a little, to the point where he can’t stop thinking about you and must get in touch. In my FREE newsletter I show you some of the most cutting edge techniques for meeting, attracting and keeping your ideal guy. So sign up today and get instant access, you can be reading the first newsletter within minutes from now.

5 Ridiculous Myths About Men And Commitment

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Both men and women are greatly prone to stereotyping each other when it comes to relationships.

So here I want to spell out and dispel some of the classic myths about men and commitment.

1. Men are less interested commitment than women

So often the battle is sold to us as this: Though a man would rather be off sowing his wild oats and sleeping around every other night, women are in constant fight to “trap” a man into commitment against his will.

This is complete NONSENSE!

But what happens often, is that when a woman assumes this is her role it actually makes a man feel this way, in which case it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy!

Trust us, if the right woman comes along, every man becomes the committing type!

2. Men have to be made to submit to a relationship

Some women believe men have to be worn down, and relentlessly pestered until they finally “give in” to commitment.

This is completely the wrong way to approach the subject, and if anything, you want to keep him guessing so that he eventually wants you to bring up the issue of commitment.

Or better yet, if he sees what an amazing time he could be having with you, he’ll want to bring it up himself.

3. Men commit when they have no other options

If you see commitment in this way, then it says everything about the kind of self-esteem you enter a relationship with.

If you want to keep a guy long term, you have to have the confidence (and believe it!) that he couldn’t be half as happy with any other woman than he could be with you.

4. Men never initiate the decision to commit

This is complete nonsense!

A man will only not bother initiating a conversation about commitment if he feels like you’re going to be around forever anyway. If you give all your time and investment into a man who hasn’t made any plans to commit to you yet, it’s no wonder he’s not going to bring it up!

What you’re showing him is that he can get all the perks of a relationship and still remain single!

You ideally want to make the time you spend together short and incredible. This way, he’ll only want to get further into a relationship with you.

5. Men see commitment as “settling”

When it comes to guys and commitment, you always want to make it feel like a positive choice on his part.

If you act like you MUST have a man in your life and need to “sell” a relationship to him, he’ll feel like he’s reluctantly settled.

However if you make it clear through your lifestyle and your actions that you don’t rely on a man for your internal confidence, he’ll want to “buy” into your already attractive.

Remember, people love to “buy”, they hate being sold to!

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