The Next Minute Could Be The One That Changes Your Whole Love Life

I’m sitting here less than two weeks out from my new TV show and book release (both on the 9th of April) and it’s a very surreal moment.

Advanced copies just arrived in the post, and it’s the first time I’ve had my hands on the real thing.

It’s a pretty special moment to be holding the book for the first time.

As I open it, between the dedication (to my mum of course ;) and the first chapter, I read the epigraph that I chose:

“This moment contains all moments” – C.S. Lewis

The meaning I take from this is that in this moment you hold the power to every other moment in your life.

Right now you have a huge array of decisions you COULD make, actions you COULD take, paths you COULD embark on. Which one you choose will determine which of the many roads you go down.

(Photo: BrianJMatis)

This beautiful sentence to me sums up what we do at GetTheGuy. I’ve come to learn that the smallest things we do are the things that generally have the biggest impact on our lives.

When a woman comes to me worried that guys just see her as a friend – or one of the guys – she usually can’t see that she is just ‘millimeters’ away from being seen as sexy or feminine. The tiny things she does in the way she touches men in a more masculine manner, or the odd word that suggests a friendship rather than a sexual connection are what determine how she is seen.

When a woman worries that she comes across as cold and unapproachable, it’s not because of anything major she’s doing wrong. It’s the small stuff. The way she turns away too fast when a guy gives her eye contact. It’s because she doesn’t smile just a couple of millimeters more with her mouth to show she’s non-threatening. It’s the way her answers to a man’s questions are just a few words short of seeming interested.

And of course, it’s the same in relationships. The moment you kiss your partner passionately for no reason at all. The 10 second call you make to tell someone you are thinking of them. The little present you bring them that cost $5 but shows you were listening when they said that thing two weeks ago.

Often we become overwhelmed by the amount of things we have to do to reach a desired goal.

I meet people all the time who are overwhelmed by the concept of going from single to meeting ‘the One’. “What am I doing wrong?” “Where should I be going?” “What do I need to be doing differently?”

If this moment does indeed contain ALL moments – every possible future outcome for your life – then what you do right now will change the picture of your life one day from now, one year from now, and even ten years from now. But nothing is served by overwhelming yourself with anticipating this change in any given moment. Instead, focus on the tiny shift you can make right now.

Pick one way to do this in this very moment.

And remember… There’s nothing bigger than the little things.

Matthew xxx


As you know my book is coming out in less than two weeks. If you are wondering what ‘little things’ you can do in your love life to find and create an incredible relationship with an amazing guy, grab a copy. You won’t regret it.

Pre-order your copy of Get The Guy now…

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92 Replies to “The Next Minute Could Be The One That Changes Your Whole Love Life”

  • Hi Matt,
    thank you AGAIN for the reminder of the millimeter shifts and the constant encouragement! Your timing is impeccable! You are making so many people feel good and happy, I hope you are getting a lot of love and happiness too!
    take care,
    xoxo Aylin

  • you’re absolutely right as always! :p
    today i’m very happy to say that all your advice has finally payed off! not for me, but for my sister, to whom i constantly told bits and pieces from your articles and videos depending on her situation.she used to be one of those girls that guys only want to be with in bed, you know? but now she’s found a great guy- following most of my(which was yours) advice- and i hope everything works out well..i’m so proud and happy for her :)
    thank you so much for all you are doing for us. i really do wish you all the luck with the show and your book :)

  • U giving me hope! With the millimeters away thing.
    Can’t wait to have your book in my hands!

    And what if he doesn’t want to commit right now, to me or any other one! Is it millimeters away too?

  • Great statements made in your article. I can’t wait for your show to premier. Did you change your book cover? I thought there used to be two hands when you did the caption contest…

  • Hi Matthew congratulation on the book ans the tv show. You inspire me since the first time I watch your YouTube Video than attend the seminar. Hope one day wil fulfills my dream like you

  • Ps. If it is the best to write YOU here I kiss lovely Hosana that it was possible to write YOU here :)
    Even if I could not write you messages- I believe lovely Hosana knew why :)& I wish YOU & your family a beautiful goodnight :)

  • Thanks Matt, that was really helpful, And congrats on the book and the show, we’re so proud of you :-)

  • hey matt, your AMAZING.. looking forward your book in cyprus doesnt matter if crisis.. keep up the good works we love you.. <3

  • ‘There’s nothing bigger than the little things.’ How True!
    I will keep that in mind! And spread the word…:) Thank you and good luck with the TV show and book release!

    Love Andrea

  • Thank you so much for your article i really enjoyed.CONGRATULATIONS for your big success you deserve it.Don’t never forget that you are incredible and you know how much i admire you.I was just thinking about you and all the accomplishments that you have made.brilliant.I wish so hard to meet you in the future or maybe attanding your retreat program also buying your’s kaoutar from MOROCCO. With love.

  • Thanks for the text, made my day again :)

    I’m waiting your book so eagerly right now! I can’t buy it right away, ’cause I don’t have enough money, but I promise, that as soon as I get my pay check, I’ll be ordering it! ;)

    Best wishes

  • Matthew, good afternoon!

    It’s great to know you are releasing a book and this extract seems to be very reasonable indeed!

    The thing is, recently I’ve met a guy and I straightaway understood he was THE ONE. There was chemistry when we first talked (although now I think it’s just him being friendly and open-minded), he invited me to an event of his and we spent a great time together, had drinks with him and his friends, until someone else told me he has a girlfriend.

    Needless to say I was obsessing about him before (when texting or sending instant messages,for example), because he took a long time to answer, but right now I’m just devastated. Every second I am next to him I feel great, morally, intellectually, physically, I feel protected and valued. And it feels they took everything away.

    I want to be honest, so I admit, relationships have always been important to me, I think they are a vector of my life. And right now, having a smart,kind, absolutely down-to-earth man of your dreams right there and knowing that he is committed (to someone older than him) is kind of killing me. It also makes me want to give up, and think maybe I am one of the cursed girls who “have it all”, but whose love life is screwed up.

    Well, anyway, back to your article, it made me think that maybe a smile a little larger or a look in the eyes a little longer made him understand? although I think I did everything I could to hint about my interest.

    If you read it, then thank you, and I hope you will take into account this niche of your audience, who is out there, meeting guys, lowering the standards and having absolutely no luck whatsoever coupled with broken hearts.

    Have a good day :)

  • Happy Easter Matt! That’s a great step for you :)
    congratulations and I can’t wait to get a copy!
    for all the options in the world, you give us motivation and the confidence to actually take… -the road less traveled-.
    I can’t help but agree with everything you say.

    congrats again x

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