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Jealous? How to Take Back Control…

FACT: Your partner is attractive. (After all, whether it’s because of his looks, his personality, or both, YOU are attracted to him!)

FACT: It’s inevitable that other women are going to find your partner attractive.

So what do you do when you look across the room and catch another woman flirting with your man? You could view it as a threat, become jealous and needy, and even storm over to the two of them and break it up… OR you could do THIS, which puts you back in control and actually builds the kind of trust that lasts. I’ve been getting lots of emails from women asking how to deal with this tricky situation, so I’ve devoted this week’s video to a deep dive into practical, actionable advice you can use right away…

Be sure to leave a comment and let me know how it works out for you.

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85 Replies to “Jealous? How to Take Back Control…”

  • That was great!!
    Thanks for all your hard work
    Your advice is simple clear effective
    Love listening to you Matt

  • That’s very true but It’s hard to realize while nobody (like you) tell you what to do.
    I would like to know what is the best way to do when your partner try to make you jealous.

    1. Call him out on it! Ask him – and also yourself – why he feels the need to play such games. True connection builds on honesty and that is not an honest behavior… Is the relationship in trouble and it’s his way of showing it?
      Yes, I am not Matthew but still thought I might just share my idea :-)

  • That’s very true but It’s hard to realize while nobody (like you) tell you what to do.
    Thanks xx
    I would like to know what is the best way to do when your partner try to make you jealous? Any ideas? :)

  • Very clear and great examples we can relate to!! Great reminder of focusing on what we can control rather than the behaviors of others which we can’t control, only influence with our reactions! :) Thanks Mat! Love when you dive deep into a subject! Love your way!!

  • Wow, this was a good one, it’s true, if he isn’t going to act right with or without you there then is he really worth being with?
    Preach Matthew Hussein
    You’re awesome!!!

  • Hey Matthew, thank you for yet another practical advice. I know what you’re saying about having no control over what other people are going to say or do in a situation. It’s a perfect opportunity to determine whether the guy is up to our values or standard of loyalty. Jealousy is very hard to control once it sets in and you give a very sound advice on how to manage it. I don’t mind the longer video. Sometimes, it’s necessary. More power to you Matthew, Stephen, and the entire team.

  • Thank u i struggle with this because my man is very friendly even though he might not be drop dead handsome. his personality catches women attention. Plus i been cheated on so my insecurity dont help. Thanks

  • Very realistic point of view, and excellent advice!. Thank you so much for remembering. It really has a lot to do with self-confidence, and maybe there is where we must begin, building up a strong self-confidence….
    Big hug.

  • One thing for once that makes sense!!!!!! If YOU ARE the flirt, that put things in a mans head and they give up on you!!!!!!!! But some men have past where they been cheated on, so its them, so depends on the man. And also TALKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IS the key, and if you can feel they are loyal nothing to worry about, as i felt no bother when one of my exs chatted someone up, as they wanted to tell ME how they felt. I knew they wouldnt go there, they were telling ME how they felt! I had an ex who two woman wanted them and they didnt go there yes they flirted to tell me something thats all! I didnt feel threaten as i knew they wouldnt go there, it was just a moment that told me they needed something from me!

    1. And i been ABUSED ALL my LIFE, and that says a lot!!!!!!!!!! I didnt feel any threat when they chatted them up IN FRONT OF ME!!!!!!!!!! As i knew it was him getting past a mood, after he chatted them up, he had a little rant at me, which was the time to give YOUR PARTNER a HUG, all they wanted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So when you feel that let them get it out of their system then give them a hug!!!!!!!!!!!

      1. When he was out i was more worried about what he up ie not woman but him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He NEVER made me feel he would go off, more what he was doing as him!!!!!!!!!!!!

    1. I live the reminder that you’re not the police and that your partner has gone out without you before in their life and dealt with attention from other people before.

      I’d love to hear a script on how to have that jealousy conversation with someone. How to verbally communicate with people and express my desires and standards without it sounding like I’m too demanding or constricting or over reacting or over thinking.

  • Hi Matthew..My husband and I met at work we ended up getting married it’s been almost 2 year now. There is a Asian girl that had not been there that long. I had been there 8 years my husband not long either he was married before his late wife had lupus.But the thing is the Asian girl..she slept with our supervisor so she could run a machine they put me with her so she ends up nip picking at every little thing that I did on my job because she still did not know how to do thing’s so she started trying to get me into trouble..she is a big flirt around guy’s including my husband..I asked my husband to stay away from her he gets mad and said he had to communicate with her if she is asking questions about something on the machine.She runs back and forth to him a lot they pick and cut up with each other and he made me feel intense every time we when into work. He told me he wished sometimes I was on another shift I said why so you guy’s can cut up all the time..he shows his self at work to much I think around women who like to flirt..well I ended up asking if I could be moved to another shift come to find out the plant manager is the Asian girl is friend’s she said I was not going to be moved..So every time my husband would cut up with that girl I would cry and he new it hurt me so I told him I was going to quit my job because of it he told me we would be fine we would make it if I got a part time job..but that’s not what I wanted I just wanted him to leave her alone but no..So I guit he still cuts up with her because I know him better. Now he is going to Arkansas a trip from work with other people I am going to be really hurt if she goes..and he is going on my birthday he is going for a week.I don’t know how to take this..he tells me I am jealous but I told him it’s just her I am his wife not her..he calls me on his break and some times he has to work with her and she can stand there with him and just chitchat..I just wish he would ignore her instead of putting me in a hurtful position..I trust him I just want him to guit giving her to much attention it’s ridiculous..when I guit my job the other women we’re mad and they said to him you knew what that girl was doing..you seen what she was doing to your wife why did you let your wife guit her job?..it’s been 7 months my birthday is coming up in May my husband is going on that trip he said he would love to go..but if she ends up going I am going to be very upset..just because all of her. With him I need help..I don’t know what to do or say. Please help me.I rather if you messagener me. But this is fine.

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