Maybe it’s happened to you before: you knew you kind of liked a guy, but then he did one special move that made your heart do a triple back flip – now you are crazy about him.
How does this happen??
It’s not about fancy tricks, it’s about understanding this secret of deep, lasting attraction…
When he gave me a one armed hug and whispered you look incredible tonight.
After we watched a football game, with friends, not just the two of us, then I had no transport to go back to my hostel. All my other friends were only concerned, & asked how am I going to go back, when my answer was walked, everyone went off with their own transport, of course, they rode bikes because all of them were men. But only this guy, who is now my husband, went back home, borrowed his housemates’ car & picked me up, send me to my hostel & went back.
The one thing that gets me attracted and is rarely found is- when a person bares his soul to me…that’s the utmost nudity of any person..when souls meet and see each other that’s the ultimate attraction which stays for life.
Amen I could not describe this with words. You did… it is the way souls meet.
Truly believe in micro attraction. Been seeing this guy for 3 months. My attraction for him grows every day. Some of my micro attractions towards him? My boss is travelling to Vietnam where my boyfriend is at the moment. My boss hates these countries. I mentioned it to Kevin, he naturally offered to take my boss out for a drink….they have never met previously. I thought…Wow! His micro attraction to me: When my semi-English accent turns to French Caribbean when I get passionate in our conversations. I am not English, I just speak it well enough. I am French caribbean and it is my natural, default accent. He notices and finds it cute that my roots come out in my accent. It touches me that he notice something so subtle yet so personal.
I am currently deployed, and the other night for me (day for her) she video chatted with me while at church. So we could both share in the moment and message!
I was at a training for work in NYC and I became friends with this guy. We left our hotel and he was late to breakfast so he had to grab a to go bag for breakfast. As we get off the subway and arewalking to where our training was we see a homeless woman with a dog. This guy goes over to her and hands her his bag of breakfast. At that moment that is when i saw him differently and became very attracted to him.
When a man said he would love to go to church with me. Even though he isn’t religious he wanted to go because he knew I liked it. It made my heart melt.
i love the video it has really opened up my mind. it is really the small things that matter
Matthew, thank you so much for this video! I have always thought absolutely the same! The microattractions, as you put it, that’s what really matters.
Once i was on a date with a guy, we were having lunch, talking about everything in the world. Talking about his career he said that before he decided to spend a gap year diving in Thailand he had taken on some charity work because it seemed unfair to him to start a new life full of sun, sea and beaches not having done first something meaningful to other people. It was the first and the only time in my life I’ve heard something like this! An amazing deep thought full of meaning and emotion. The moment he said it i knew i fell for him:)
When I first spent the night at my now-boyfriend’s house. I had been deeply nervous because of a personal anxiety of sleeping next to people I’m unfamiliar with. I decided to tell him honestly of my anxiety, he was the first man I’ve ever told (it had ruined previous early-Stage relationships for me). I thought he would be weirded out by my nerves but without a word he got up, made a spare bed in the next room and told me at any point in the night I could move to sleep in there if I wanted. He was completely calm, unphased and caring. I have never felt so shocked or amazed by anyone. Since then we have moved in together and are on our way to getting a puppy together. I couldn’t feel more comfortable with him (and never needed to use the spare room).
When my boyfriend randomly made a special gift: a book, which he had head about and whose protagonist reminded him of me.
It’s something rather trivial per se, but I had a clock in the kitchen and weeks after the time change in summer I still hadn’t put it to the right time. He noticed it in the evening and the next morning when I woke up (although he didn’t sleep at my place) the clock was set at the right time.
Trivial but yet so impactful, made me feel that he cared…
There was a very low key New Year’s Party at the bar down the street where me and my friends were celebrating. I brought Christmas cookies that I had made, so we don’t go hungry. A few guys started talking to us, and this one guy I have seen around before. When I took out the Christmas cookies, he looked at me in awe and said You will be the mother of my children.
I was into another guy and didn’t go out with him but I though it was very special to see a guy making a statement like this.
We were driving and an older gentle had a flat tire, we waved him down off the road and he changed the mans tire for him.. and refused the money that the gentleman offered. For him he likes the small things I do.. bringing him lunch at work on weekends, or reading a book he recommended, or bringing him his favourite tea when he’s not feeling well. It is definitely the small things that count.
I was talking to a guy I liked on the phone and I heard his little son complaining and asking for his attention..my heart melted when I heard the guy responding sweetly to his son promising to finish the phonecall and go near him soon to play with him.That made me realise how much he loves his son.
Dear Matthew,
You are so much of a deep person,a deep thinker, a super brain powered gentleman that the first time I saw one of your videos I had fallen for you not my own guy I was going out with.
You also give so much help in what to look for in a man
than anyone before.I dont understand man much but I want to understand you. Your mises must be a very lucky woman I really envy. Good bless you. Have a fantastic day! xxxxxxx loves ya
Natalie
Mathew,
You are SO exactly spot on with this video. I was with a guy who endeared me to him with the ‘little’ things he did. The first time I stayed overnight at his place, in the morning he got up early, allowing me to sleep in and brought me a cup of tea, because he knew I loved having one in the morning. It was so selflessly done and it was clear it was instinctive for him to be thoughtful. He did more things like that in the next few months of our courting. I recall how it made me stop and take pause and think..’Wow, how incredibly valued, appreciated and truly cared about he made me feel. A very special feeling.
I recently broke up with the love of my life. Actually he left me 18 months ago but I’m still processing.
Even if a part of me wants to move on, another part thinks that I’ll never find a love like this again. Because that’s exactly what we had. Little things. Everyday.
The first one that actually made me fall for him was the first time I saw him. It wasn’t a date, it was a gathering of people that met on a forum on internet. I already “knew” him virtually, but I’ve never met him.
So I was the first at the meeting point, looking for the party to arrive. And I saw him, accross the street, a bit further away. He was helping an old blind guy who just bumped into someone. He helped him pick up the bag he just drop and then crossing the street and stayed with him until the guy assured he was ok to go on by himself.
I figured this guy has a true kind soul. And I was right. He really was.
When he takes even a few seconds to just focus on me, make eye contact and smile. When he takes the time to ask me what I’m passionate about and listens to my answer. When he opens up about his past and shows he’s vulnerable too. When he extends his hand for a high five but instead of slapping my hand, keeps his hand pressed against mine gently for a moment. The way his eyes light up and his expression changes when he sees me. The way he takes time to acknowledge and talk to customers’ children, getting down on their level, including them in conversation. The look of surprise and genuine thankfulness on his face as he told me he appreciated that I bought him lunch because he didn’t know if he was going to eat that day. The moment I was in his thoughts long enough for him to send me a beautiful music video related to a recent experience I shared with him. The way he asks if his little brother got home safely. The ways in which he tries to help his friends. His dedication to his faith. How he does not compromise his values for temptations. His volunteer work.
I’m September, met & went on one coffee date with this guy & then he left to go back to Malta & the yacht he was working on. He was then leaving on a 2 month transatlantic crossing, with rare moments of WiF & cell coverage. Never thought I’d hear back from him & honestly kept my feelings so gaurded with him because what can you expect from someone in this situation…. AND, I’ve met other guys in the meantime, butttt there’s something consistent and different about this guy, that keeps me wanting to get to know him more.
He kept in touch all along the way, messaging me as soon as he would dock, always when he told me last he was expected to make it to the next port. He has remembered all the things I’ve got going on, also checking in on me whenever things are coming up. Recently he told me that his job is extremely demanding, but he loves it—was made for it even. However, after meeting me just the one time he knew I was special and that his perfect career isn’t everything & that changes everything. Have no clue where this will go with Sailor man, buutttt he’s surprised me with his vulnerability, selflessness, and sweet thoughtfulness. Alllllll things I am looking for in a life partner. ♀️