I’m on Clearwater beach right now getting ready to start my 5-day Retreat tomorrow. I don’t have my normal video set up with me, but I’m going to do my best to shoot something on my phone to say hi while I’m here.
In two weeks my show comes out on NBC.
In just three weeks my book comes out in North America.
All this means that my current schedule is pretty unrelenting.
As I write this my trainers are all sat around me on the top floor of the hotel, working on content before we go into action mode for the next 5 days.
Here’s the view from where I am:
It’s always strange the day before going on stage. I sit and think about all of the things I want to convey, and I go through my training manuals to make sure I’m on my game. One of the most important things to do before a speech is to emotionally connect with your material. If you don’t do that you can have the best material in the world but you won’t speak from the heart.
I work incredibly hard and I think about my work a lot. Often people tell me to take a break or to go on holiday. But what they don’t realise is that this IS my holiday. I’m doing what I love. There’s nothing else in the world I’d rather be doing. Maybe that’ll change one day. Maybe I’ll go in another direction altogether. But until it does, I’ll keep doing this all day everyday, because my life is focused on doing what I LOVE.
When I talk to people about their lives and whether they are doing what they love, I often hear this response: “Yeah but for you it’s easier because the successes you get validates the work you’re putting into it. It reinforce your efforts so it becomes easier to work hard.”
There is a lot of truth to this. The successes I’ve gotten HAVE reinforced my behaviour and provided much needed motivation at times.
But here is where this idea misses the point:
I was doing this LONG before there were any successes to report.
For those of you who have been following my work for years, you may remember this video:
I filmed this over 3 years ago when I was living in my apartment in London and none of this had happened. I have even older videos from 3 years before that (which were pretty terrible by today’s standards) when I was really only starting out in coaching. When I first started I was in survival mode. It really wasn’t easy. There was a ton of rejection. Lots of doors closing on me from people who said I was nobody, that I had no experience and wasn’t established enough.
But I did it anyway because, well, what else would I do?
See it’s true that on some projects in life you stop when you’re not getting any rewards.
But when it’s your love, your passion, you do it regardless of the ‘validation’, because you know you wouldn’t be doing anything else in the world.
If your love in life was business, then you wouldn’t stop creating businesses just because one project didn’t pay off. You would just change your approach. If you love business then you know you’ll be creating businesses till the day you die, because that’s what you love.
A painter who is a painter in her heart doesn’t stop painting because no one is buying her work. She paints because that’s who she is at her core – a creative soul who expresses it through her paintings. She doesn’t do it for the money.
I love the lifestyle I get from my public speaking. I love the fact that I get to travel. I love the amazing individuals I’ve been able to meet as a result, and the opportunities it affords me in life. But I was doing this before I had any of that, and I’ll still be doing this when the TV cameras go away. I’d do this if there was NO money in it and I had to sustain myself working in Mcdonalds. I’d be doing this if I had only one person to give a seminar to each week, because I F*****G LOVE learning about and helping people. It’s my obsession.
Everything else is a just a wonderful bonus (most of which I never even anticipated, let alone got motivated by).
Oh and do I need to point out the obvious parallel with your love life?
- Flirt because you LOVE flirting.
- Love because you LOVE loving.
- Be courageous because you LOVE being courageous.
Don’t do it for the rewards – those are all just wonderful bonuses.
I want to leave you with a video today from an up-and-coming artist who is also carving his space out in the world. His name is George Watsky and he’s another great story to follow. His new song is called Cardboard Castles. I have no reason to promote his work other than the fact that his song sums up so much of this blog post, and that I love to help someone succeed in doing what they love.
My favourite line of the song:
“I do things on a shoe string you couldn’t do with a cool mill”.
Because that’s what we do here on this blog. We work with what we have. You don’t have stone? Then build your castles out of cardboard.
I’ll finish with a question aimed at you…
What do you do in your life for no other reason than you LOVE it? If you have 30 seconds tell me by leaving a comment below. I can’t wait to learn about your passion in life.
Massive love to you AND your wonderful life.
Matthew
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Wow! I’m super excited for your amazing success, Matthew!! Especially since I remember when you were a “nobody.” teehee. Just kidding. It was obvious that your knowledge, insights, drive & ambition to make a difference would take you far.
… and the good looks helped a wee bit too. ;)
Congrats!
I love my job police dispatching & 911 call taking. Best thing I have ever done in my life and I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. I love helping out our citizens, educating them and helping to make sure our officers have everything they need in order to do their jobs effectively & efficiently. It makes me really happy.
Unfortunately due to the hours and stresss that domes with the job my love life has fallen on the back burner, this I have decided to change. I am going out more, working out, eating right and I feel amazing!! I have been taking what I have learned from you and put it into play. Just this weekend I was out with friends and created an opportunity. There was a guy at the club that I caught looking at me sobefore iI left I approached him with my name & number… We will see what happens! But the fact that I did it with nothing but pure confidence and his reaction of a raised eyebrow and a smile when he took my information was priceless and if it served as nothing more than to boost both our confidence, that makes me EXTREMELY Happy as well! :)
I bake bread! I have not bought a loaf in 3 years!! It’s waaaay more work than driving to the store and plonking down a few dollars … But I love it!
I love graphic design. That’s what I am studying at college. I actually switched to graphic design/art after fighting it for years because everyone was telling me that I could not make it my life or my career. I made the switch shortly after I found your videos. Then I found a story in a book i was reading about the bumble bee. It said there is not reason that can be proven by physics that the bumble bee should fly. It flies because it has to. With both your videos and blog and that story, I changed the plan for my entire life. Keeping in mind that you do what you love and love what you do because sometimes you just have to be a bumble bee.
Thank you so much,
Michelle
I work as a speech pathologist, and I flippin’ LOVE my job. thank god for small miracles, huh? I also create paper cut-outs and stencils which are nothing too impressive but they are my artistic release!
Ohoh and I adore playing jazz music on my trumpet – i have been playing since I was ten and on a rainy day the first thing I go for is my shiny bugle! :D
Also I would like to say to you Matthew that you helped me gain my first real date at 19 as well as many more wonderful male friends and continue to help me put aside shyness for openness (which is tricky for me I can tell you now)!
WHOOP WHOOP THREE CHEERS FOR YOU!
Best of luck with your future Matthew,
You made it on your own! :)
I love myself. I love my family. I love my friends.
LOVE giving love, LOVE receiving love.
P.S. i love you too Matthew!
Matt,
I love how passionate you are about your work. How do you suggest I find my passion in life?
Thank you,
– Sam
I love the environment. I have been fighting relentlessly since I was 12 to educate people about why caring about our world and the people in it is the greatest calling of all. But it is really draining when I give and give and people around me take and take and never understand my passion. I hope one day that will change.
I love working out. It has been a fundamental part of my life the past 6 years. It has transformed my body and my confidence. But unfortunately it doesn’t replace having a man to love, which is what I’m struggling quite alot with at present.
When my husband died three years ago, I realized I had two choices: 1) Stay stuck in the passenger seat of a life I loved but that was limited to the things we BOTH wanted or 2)Take the chance that everyone around me would think I was nuts and do what I really wanted to do.
I’m opening a bed and breakfast (which I’m building from the ground up) so I can combine a love of taking care of people (on my own terms) by offering them a comfortable, peaceful, interesting place to stay and also allow myself to spend my days playing. Playing in my garden, playing with my animals, playing music, playing with words and ideas…just…whatever I want. And I love that my daughters will get to grow up watching their mother do that.
I’ve reached an age and a level of life experience where I just don’t care if people think I’ve lost my mind. If I’m the crazy outspoken environmentalist artsy hippie woman on the hill who writes songs but doesn’t want a music career and refuses to eat her animals, then so be it. I’m spending my days being present inside what I love. Anyone else’s ideas about what I should do with my precious time be damned.
Passion is my passion. My whole life, people have called me words like “fiery” and “loud” and “enthusiastic” because I do nothing by halves. I’m either fully passionate, or completely indifferent. I don’t seem to have a dimmer switch.
In the past, it scared off guys (but attracted gay best friends in droves!). The advice I got from people usually amounted to them saying, “Tone it down.” But then I didn’t feel true to myself.
It took your videos for me to realize how amplified my natural assertiveness was, and you’ve helped me redirect my energies into a more playful and teasing expression.
Can’t wait until you come to NYC next month! Already have my ticket!!
I LOVE your blogs. : ) What am I passionate about? I am thinking about doing some kid of ministry, maybe go on a missions trip or something.
Thanks for the love and support Matt!
I LOVE to travel, sing, dance, laugh, go to the beach, go to concerts and listen to music!
I have been trying to recover from chronic fatigue syndrome for five years now. It’s a tough one, trying so hard to get rid of it. There have been some rewards and improvements however most of the time it is more trying to get rid of it and recover and now being rewarded.
I guess how can I get past this?
I’m doing everything I can that’s in my control and will look at my achievements and improvements.
Good luck with the retreat :)
X
You must be Love Cupid in your previous life.:-P You are so incredibly passionate about what you do that your zest gets me moving and impresses me!!!:-) Thank you for your post.It really touched me.x :-)
I remember when I accidentally came across your videos (about a year ago) and I liked what I learned. What I like and I do regardless of what would happen is quilling and maybe one day I will be able to make a competition with people who do quilling, is an art and not everyone has that talent.
Hi Matthew! I guess at the moment I really do not give myself a break because I just got a new job of getting which I started pursuing already in July when the owner of this place just had a tiny idea of opening that shop in that location. I heard about that idea then and jumped on it by sending him a letter with my resumé in it. A month later I randomly saw him in his other shop in another city. He went out to drink wine with his friends. As I told one of the young guys working there that I sent and e-mail he encouraged me a lot to go and talk to the owner. So after being convinced for 15 minutes I out of characterly went and had a chat with him. All this happened in July and August 2013. In January 2013 I saw an advert of them officially looking for employees in that location I had applied for. Therefore I sent him an e-mail saying hey it’s me, I’m still interested and available. So now in March 2013 I’m an proud employee of that company. we opened our boutique in that location exactly a week ago. So long story short: I never thought that my dreams, nevermind how small or big, could come true, but obviously they do. In addition last week while working I met a customer that responded extremely accurately to my idea of the man I’d really really like. For the first time ever I actually felt that a guy actually is as interested in me as am I in him. At least according to the signs. Anyway since I might not see him ever again I’ll always remember the feeling. Such a confidence booster.
AMAZING!
But I LOVE my job!
I absolutely LOVE going to theatre in order to watch plays, ballets, musicals… Actually I’m going there tonight! Therefore I must finish writing a part of my bachelor thesis and another uni paper before I go. :) :)
But it’s amazing how life changes! The 2013 is absolutely wonderful! I’m sure it’s an beginning of a new awfully happy period of my life when the last 12 years bloody horrible.
Keep up the good work, Matthew! Keep chasing your dreams!
And big big thank you! :)
Hello, Matthew!
Everything that around me makes ME happy. I think cheerful people will save the world;)I adore listening to music that touches my ear. I can even wake up with a song in my mind and sing it all day long;) besides to get rid of problems i open a book, and just “fuck” the reality, sorry;) if it’s summer i’m fond of riding a bike, hiking, just being alone with nature, roller skating, feeding pigeons, you know, some simple pleasures. And of course my pupils make me happy daily, i’m only 20 and i believe i’m on the right way!
joyful Olga
keep smiling;)
I love and really appreciate what you have been doing because it is showing that you always think about others. Also I have learnt and grown up a lot because of you. Thank you very very much. With massive love from a Thai fan.
Take good care :D
In regards to passion I love traveling, food, cooking, painting, working with numbers and anything competitive. But…
Matthew, I’ve been on sooo many dates the past year, so many people I’ve met, so many guys I’ve had to get over. Just when I start to be excited about someone new , out of the blue it is done. I know it’s just not out of the blue but I am so sick of this. And as your video states I put my best self on and still!
I don’t find it hard to pick up a guy, but for some reason they do not stay. And I know most of your tips and pay for your videos… but when the 40th billion time someone this year has just stopped talking to me after asking for my number, being on a couple of dates, or even dating for a bit – it really does make me wonder what I am doing wrong.
Ugh if I could tell you my life story I would, which is this nonsense for 24 years. I’m giving up hope, as I just started to get it back :(
I love my self no matter what happen, love my family sister and brother, leaving alone far away from home is teaching me a lot..
but honest i learn many things from u matt. so ILOVEYOU too.. :) GOD BLess you more…