Get Any Guy To Approach You With This 1 Simple Trick

In this week’s video I want to show you how to get any guy to approach you.

He can be on the other side of the room…

You don’t have to say a word…

You don’t have to risk rejection…

And it’s so ridiculously simple, when I show you, you’re going to wonder why you haven’t been doing this all along.

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76 Replies to “Get Any Guy To Approach You With This 1 Simple Trick”

  • Matthew – yes, this works ladies because I’ve done it…LOL. I tried this technique; the hot guy came over, smiled and was so nice and we chatted for a bit. I just wanted to meet him. I don’t know what made me wave him over because it’s a bold gesture but I think because I didn’t fester in the thought of doing it, I just seized the moment. Carpe diem!


  • Matt. You are hot! How far you have come in your style and confidence in the last 3 years. I just wanted to say hi…hehe

    Vancouver, BC

  • Ive never had looks like that with a stranger. I’m normally too shy to continue looking for long because it can turn into staring :/

    1. I Know what you are talking about weird staring. At the supermarket last week some guy was staring at me for like 60 seconds straight with no smile. I thought he wanted to abduct and kill me. It was so creepy! LOL…

      “Eye contact is what sets souls on fire!” It has to be done right though.

      Do only 6 or 7 seconds of staring at a time otherwise it gets creepy. Make sure to smile or smirk sexily at second #4 then look away to friends or your cell phone if alone etc.. Then wait 4 seconds then look back for 2 seconds with a sexy smirk then look away again and wait until you feel its right to look back again. Make sure you are positioned so you can see him if he is looking at you while your not looking so you’ll know when to look back for 6 or 7 seconds again. Then you’ve got him. Watch that movie MY GEISHA about learning how to drop a man with one look. Its awesome and really works! Practice on men everywhere until it becomes natural to you.

  • Hiii!
    Loved the Posts as usual!!

    Can the camera please keep still when Matt’s filming!
    Be nice to concentrate on the message, not the scenery, and his nice cheek bone structure from all angles.
    It’s distracting and been happening a bit..
    Love You Guys
    *just putting it out there
    Great job Jamieson (Jamela) Lv u Matt xx

    1. I agree this new camera angle thing was distracting especially with the mirrors.i felt a disconnect from it but I am sure they were just trying something new to be more artsy fartsy.

  • You are So funny Matthew Hussey! I was laughing so hard the whole time watching this..Had to leave a comment to let you know. Thank you for that!! :D

  • Could you address about interracial dating as far as wondering if a white guy would be interested in a black woman. Are there any different tips or the same tips you give.

    1. Shakita, Attraction is attraction. If he is not into inter-racial relationships he won’t show any interest just as if he wouldn’t show interest in blondes if he is not into blondes or if he wants a Christian woman and meets a Jewish girl he will not have interest. Its all a numbers game. I always have trusted God to remove men from my experience that are not right for me. When I look back on the men I thought I wanted that didn’t work out, I always see it was a blessing or I see them a year or so later and say to myself “What the hell was I thinking wanting that guy?!! Thank God it didn’t work out!” LOL

      Hope you find what you are looking for.

  • Bonjour Matthew,

    I love this one! It’s really genuine and so cute :) I will try it for sure !

    Have a wonderful Sunday ! :)

  • What bad can come of this is the woman is now in the pursuer role and the guy is in his feminine. Whoever speaks first is the man in the relationship. All the woman has to do is go to the ladies room and walk right by him. Don’t stop unless he stops you. If he does nothing on your way to the ladies room, give him 5 minutes to figure out what to do on your way back. It makes it easy for him to not cross the room but neither are you since you purpose of walking by him is to get somewhere else. You are just using the ladies room in his mind. I have done this hundreds of times and works like a charm. They will always stop you on your way back. Art first on your way towards him he thinks you are approaching him but then you throw him off by walking right by, with a smile of course. He thinks he missed his chance but then realizes you will have to walk by him again.

    Also you can leave your friends and go to the bar or coffee counter to get your own drink, closest to him. If he wants to meet you he will follow you there while you are alone. On your way to the bar just eye flirt with him then look away and go about getting your drink. As you wait look back with eye contact, smile and look away until he joins you.

    Don’t wave him over. It makes you look like your being aggressive and he will later wonder how many guys you do this with. Make it easy for him to approach you by positioning yourself. If a guy is waiting for you to make a move he is not much of a leader, Alpha male. He is more likely, a Mama’s Boy, Peter Pan looking for someone to take care of him and do all the work. The only way to find out what kind of guy you are getting is to see what he does or doesn’t do to get to know you. Men who don’t take action in the beginning are telling you either he has no confidence in himself, is used to someone else doing things for him, is afraid of rejection therefore is passive in getting what he really wants, and he wants you, the woman, to take the lead and be the man in the relationship.

    If he gives you his number and doesn’t ask for yours he wants you to be the man and pursue him. Sorry Matthew but some of your advice for women to make a first move, i.e. by gesturing or talking first is setting women up with men who are in the passive feminine role instead of masculine role. The only way to tell what kind of man you are interested is by his actions or lack of. And as women we tell men what kind of women we are by our lack of action or actions. Does she want to wear the pants or does she follow my lead as a truly feminine woman?

    As you described Matthew, If a woman is to wave a guy back to come to her instead, when he approaches her she should just smile and wait for the man to speak first.

    Be easy to get ladies but let the man do the getting.
    Note, I did not say be easy. Don’t sleep with him until you have a commitment contract.

        1. You make some valid points JJ. Cheers. I liked hearing how the scenario played out. Does your point matter so much if once they’ve exchanged numbers she leaves the lead all up to him from there on in?

          1. It’s hard to leave the ball in his court once you started initiation. My point was that as women we wait to see what he does or doesn’t do to prove what kind of man he is, a mans man or a little boy letting mama take care of things. It’s a way of quickly finding out if you will be waisting your time down the road with a man who is always letting you move the relationship and other things forward. His lack of initiation also tells you he is not a go getter since he waits for things to come to him instead of overcoming his fears and insecurities and pursuing what he wants. You’ll never know if a guy really wants you by making yourself something that is just convenient for him rather than being a woman he can’t live without.

            If you do make the mistake of speaking or pursuing first, let that be a jump start and then just stop all other actions and see what he does. No calls, no texts, no dropping by his work place. If he does nothing he is either a little boy or he is not that interested enough to pursue. Give a guy 8-10 weeks to process you then move on if you have not heard from him. Sometimes they are getting out of an old relationship or need time to appreciate you compared to the other superficial or bossy women etc, they are currently dating only to realize you could be a better option for him. Whatever the reason, men often need time to mull a new woman over before he starts chasing you. But if you call or text him first you interrupt this process for him. You may want to call to show him how great of a catch you are but really the less he knows about you in the beginning the better. Keep him wanting more. Let his fantasies about you drive him in your direction. Keep the mystery because we can often talk too much in the begining and talk him right out of liking us. Keep conversation light, fun, playful to keep him in his feeling attraction mode rather than getting all intellectual with him and putting him in his thinking man to man mode. Don’t lead the conversation. Be voice activated, mostly let him lead the conversation. Let him work at getting to know you. This will also tell by the kind of topics and questions he talks about with you, what it is about you that he is interested in, you or just your body. Does he truly want to get to know you or is he making small talk until he can get in your pants? ….

            All of this letting a man do the pursuing in not just about being a lady but to inform you who this man really is and what does he really want with you. If women take the lead role, they will never know. If you take the lead pursuing role and a guy rejects you it is most likely he is a real man who won’t let a woman lead him. He will look for a woman who will respect his ability and wanting to lead while she gladly is receptive to his advances in getting to know her.

        1. JJ that was BRILLIANT. You have surpassed the Hussey brothers here and you can start your own blog about dating.

          I think Matt and Steve are really good at showing us how to
          (i) develop social skills in general
          (ii) build self-esteem and grow as a person
          (iii) build an independent and interesting life

          But I often disagree with Matt’s view that women can initiate conversation and interactions and other little things and that doesn’t make them unfeminine. But you see it doesn’t work that way like you said. The smallest initiation can set the dynamic of a relationship that can be hard to change later on leaving both people frustrated if they truly are their respective masculine and feminine selves.

          That is where I think you are 100% right. Be easy to get (not easy) but let the man do the getting RIGHT FROM THE START. Although Matt argues that many guys are shy and have approach anxiety and we are most likely to be hit by players if we always rely on the guy to approach, the thing is that the pursuer-prize dynamic gets established very early and if we start conversations and calling etc.even if we don’t escalate to asking out–we risk ending up with someone who is more beta/feminine or lazy or immature. And guys tend to follow if you’re the one starting the conversation and seem to believe that you LIKE wearing the pants. And that sucks.

          I personally hate making the first move at all..including starting conversations so this works for me since I am pretty passive socially. I am more comfortable with making myself more approachable by smiling and generally being receptive and positioning myself.

          The advice given here by Matt can really backfire and make you look silly if the guy ignores your handwaving. It isn’t very feminine either and I don’t particularly like it.

    1. Personally, I like to be the person who moves first. Not everyone agrees with the stereotype of “the guy has to make the first move”. just my opinion. But yours is your opinion too. :)

      1. I respect your choice Rileigh but I have a question… Do you like to pursue guys because you are impatient or want to be in control?… If you are impatient then you really want a man to pursue you but you don’t like the passivity of waiting, which for most women is frustrating being on his time rather than your time.

        But if you like to pursue because you want to be in control of him then go for it. It says you want men who are followers rather than leaders. There is nothing wrong with women who want to be in control and respected for their actions and thoughts and that also means you are giving up having your feelings cherished by a man in order to be respected for taking control.

        I write this to you because many woman think they want to pursue and like to pursue men but in reality would like a guy to come after & chase them instead. Its just the impatience of waiting for him and being on his time frame that can suck. But when women chase a man we give up a lot. Being cherished is one thing we give up. WHen a man lets us chase him, we are cherishing him i.e. putting his feelings first above ours. We become the givers and receive little back, especially from little mama’s boys. It is less romantic since we are in the pursuer mode, we don’t get the little sweet surprises, gifts or protection from a man since we are the chasers we become the givers and protectors instead of him.
        Often men who allow women to do all the work will not be the guy to step up and protect us when we are in a situation where we are threatened, physically, emotionally or any other way. They let the woman fend for herself. To me that is not a turn on and a romance killer.
        I am willing to sacrifice a little control to get where a man is a man and a woman is a woman and I am swept off my feet, well protected and my feelings are cherished. My man will do whatever it takes to make me feel good rather than dating a little boy who cares more about his own feelings than mine. A real man gives, protects, nurtures and cherishes. I want that in trade for letting him take the reigns of the relationship otherwise it ends up to be a roomate situation equal- equal or it ends up I am doing all the work and the other is doing nothing.

        Just something to think about. I was there a long time ago and it is much better letting a man think he is in control. As Matthew says, it is really a clever woman who can let a man think it is his idea when its really hers. The best of both world IMO.

        Best of luck to you in finding your true love!

    2. Yes that is correct also. Either a guy wants you to pursue him or he has no intention of calling, a brush off. If a guy really wants a date with a woman, he will not let the possibility of never seeing her again happen by not getting her number before she leaves.

      1. JJ, many guys WILL take your number and never call (and it is NOT because they lost it) so that in itself doesn’t mean much.

        However, my pet peeve is when a guy gives me HIS number and asks me to call him. Another version is–hey, feel free to add me on Facebook. Or, come by my office sometime. I find this really frustrating because seriously, if HE is interested in ME then HE should pursue and get me interested, right? Why can’t HE call, ADD me on Facebook himself and come by MY office? Are these things very difficult to do? Why would he assume that I am already interested when he hasn’t made ANY effort to get me interested?

        Sometimes this can even happen on a date where the guys asks you out but then leaves it to you to decide everything else–where do you want to eat, which movie should we see? I mean, HE’s the one taking me out so what happened to HIS plans?

        The second annoying thing about this is the implicit “order”..that I should do the work if this is going to happen. Like handing someone your luggage so that they can lug it for you.

        The third is that it sounds so feminine–like–look at me, I’m so cute, all the girls chase me and you should too!

        The funny thing is many guys have done this to me who aren’t even all that good looking or attractive. Sometimes I believe a lot of guys do this because they are insecure and don’t want to take risks so they want to put the burden on the woman. That is understandable because men get rejected a lot. But what they don’t understand is that men will have to be the pursuers because women invest more in a relationship (esp. biologically) and carry other risks which men don’t appreciate. So it is only fair to let them take the risk of initial pursuit.

        My standard response to such guys is always a smile and then NOTHING. I never call, go to their office or add them on Facebook or make any effort whatsoever and I’m always happy to lose them because this turns me off so much, that even if the guy reverses his stance I’m not ok with it.

        As for guys who DO ask for my number (very few), I tend to not expect them to call and that way I don’t get disappointed. Some will call and follow through though and the good thing is that they are at least making a sincere effort even if the relationship doesn’t work out.

      2. Oh also, JJ, I have often had guys invite me to parties,events or places where they will be performing/showcasing their talent (if he’s a musician), or some kind of group outing.

        Now I understand this is NOT a date and I’m fine with going to events if they really interest me. I just see these events a possibility to meet new people and have fun regardless of what happens with the guy.

        But is this behavior also beta/feminine?

        How do I know this it is a pre-cursor to a date–because maybe he wants to get to know me in a non-pressure group setting first?

        Should I go to these events if I sense there is some underlying attraction from his side, even if I’m not thrilled about the event? The problem is that I don’t want him to think I don’t like him by saying no.

        What if he keeps inviting me to more and more group events but never makes a date? He isn’t exactly friend-zoning me because there is no sex without a relationship or friend like behavior form my side. And there is no firm gf/romantic interest on his end of things and there is some mild flirtation going on between the two of us only.

        But this often seems like he is keeping me around or screening me and watching how I fit into his life without actually INVESTING in me and I don’t like it.

        You mentioned give guys 8-10 weeks to get their head around a woman. Why? That is too much! I personally get put off if a guy takes that long. I’m not saying he should commit to me by the 3rd date but if he is just “checking me out” for 2 -3 months while also “checking out” 10 other girls, then it shows me that he’s either very indecisive or I’m not that attractive to him or he just wants to have fun, not serious etc.
        I’m ok if a guy is initially interested in a few girls (not EVERY girl) but then he better zero in on me after some time if he really likes me. He can take his time to seal the relationship deal but he cannot pursue other women simultaneously for 3 months!

        So how do I handle a guy who won’t make an explicit date. This seems to be happening a lot nowadays. Meeting up and hang outs have replaced traditional dates–but I crave traditional courtship so much! Please advise.

  • But this would only work if you DO have some kind of chemistry in the first place. What if he never meet your glance? Clearly if he is not interested (by the way you look, let’s admit it) he won’t come over…

  • The frontal – side view – frontal…stick to the frontal. That wasn’t Jameson, was it?
    Otherwise, good content.

  • Love it. So practical, step-by-step, do-able. It’s not half-way advice, but all the way actionable, with the opening line suggestion. Thank you.

  • Hii Matt,

    This is great advice and really quite simple and risk free..I did sort of this tactics before but with a smile on my face and it works..The guy who was a stranger did walk over to me and I got to know him…

    This strategy does works..

  • I have heard that that type of beckoning can be misconstrued as an insult in some cultures. So then, what?

  • This is the most perfect video I’ve seen so far. It is ridiculously simple that I’m practicing in my mind already with the guys I make eye contact and find chemistry with :)

  • AWW MAAAN!! I really wanted to do that in a dark alley! oh well. Lol. I really enjoy your vieos and I thank you so much
    . :D

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