We can all learn a thing or two from Gatsby.
If you’ve read the book or seen the film, you know that Gatsby threw crazy, opulent parties where hundreds of people poured through the doors.
Here are some of my big takeaways from the story…
1) Why throw parties
If you’re the person throwing the party, everyone knows you.
The person throwing a party is someone we call a ‘hub’.
You become everyone’s common point of conversation, you’re the favourite topic for people to talk about, and everyone gets to know you better through their discussion.
The great thing about being a ‘connector’ is that by putting people together, people want to reciprocate by helping you out and doing you favours. You become important in that way.
2) An alternative to becoming a ‘hub’
With that said, you don’t have to be the one throwing the party all of the time to develop a network.
What you do need however – if you’re not going to be the hub – is build a good relationship with a hub.
If you know the person throwing the party, you always have a way to go and meet people.
You can then use this person as a gateway to meeting more and more new people.
3) Have an emotional vision for life
One of the things we know about Gatsby is that through all of his achievement, he had an extremely emotional vision of where he was going.
I’m always coaching that if you want to get somewhere, you can’t be driven by logic.
Logic doesn’t last. Logic leads you to running on will-power and will-power never lasts.
You have to run on emotion. You have to find something that drives you on a visceral, gut level.
For Gatsby it was a woman. It was the ideal he had in his head – and of course that become an unhealthy ideal because it became unrealistic – but he had something driving him that was bigger than an amount of money or the size of a house. It was a VISION of his life with somebody.
We all have to find an emotional vision that’s going to drive us through the hard times.
4) Believe you’re destined for greatness
Gatsby believed that he was destined for greatness, even as a boy.
You have to believe on some level that you’re destined for great things. We all have to believe that we’re special in our own way.
–What makes YOU special?
5) Have a plan
Gatsby had a way of constantly improving himself and saw himself as his greatest asset.
(In the book) His dad found a journal with his daily diary.
Schedule Sept 12th 1906
Rise from bed – 6:00 AM
Dumbbell exercise and wall scaling – 6:15 – 6:30 AM
Study electricity etc. – 7:15 – 8:15 AM
Work – 8:30 – 4:30 PM
Basketball and sports – 4:30 – 5:00 PM
Practice elocution, poise and how to obtain it – 5:00 – 6:00 PM
Study needed inventions – 7:00 – 9:00 PM
General Resolves
–No wasting time at Shafters
–No more smoking or chewing
–Bathe every other day
–Read one improving book or magazine a week
–Save ($5.00 – crossed out) $3.00 a week
–Be better to parents
Have things that act as a compass for how you live.
If you’re thinking about this when you wake up, it’s already too late.
This has to done the night before so that when you wake up, you’re straight into action and you know exactly where you want to be.
Now Gatsby had his flaws. But I feel like we can all learn something, even from flawed men.
When we take his best parts and combine them with the learnings we see from a far, that’s when we’ll achieve our own form of greatness.
Question: What did you take away from The Great Gatsby? Let me know in the comments below!
I really liked the book. I was always amazed that Gatsby amassed such wealth and influence because of his desire to win Daisy over. Finding my motivation through emotion rather than logic is something that I could defiantly work on.
I also like the tip you give for being the alternative to the hub. I’m very sociable when I’m the one throwing the party and I know everyone there. When I go to someone’s party however where I don’t know many people, I leave as soon as I can without offending the host. That is of course if I go at all. I found the video entertaining and informative. I will try some of the tips you gave us. I promise.
P.S. You looked very nice the suit.
Thanks Elle!
Yeh talking to the host is vital. They are the connectors and connectors will introduce you to SO many people. It’s the key to expanding your network quickly.
M x
Haha, soo cute and witty! :)
Matthew, I just want you to know that I’ve been following you since the very beginning and I’ve gotten to a point where I trust your advice more than I trust my own logic because it works every single time.
Obviously, you don’t know me but your videos are so honest and personal that I feel like you’ve been my friend for a long time.
I’ve been reading your book and I LOVE it. I am writing a novel myself ;). I am 21 and have written short stories before, but never something this long. Do you have any advice for me?
<3,
Layla
Hey Layla,
I’m honoured that you consider me a friend. I would love to meet you one day. I hope it’s soon!
Let’s keep our friendship going : )
x
That was the best video you have done yet!!! Loved the martinis hilarious!!!!
You always give sound advice in a creative way which keeps me intrigued to keep watching your videos.
Next time I would wear a white French cut shirt would look so crisp & fresh with the yellow tie complimenting the white jacket. I love the waistcoat balances it all out – a simple silk pocket square & ring would have taken you to another level!
Hey Karen!
So glad you thought it was the best one. It took a lot of work to put together as you can imagine. Even the getting dressed took a while lol.
x
I’m at a dead end here Matt and I don’t know what to do. :(
I left an explanation in The Man Myth section 3 response.
I was feeling kind of down today, and watching this video really helped me!!! Thank you, God bless.
Hey Hussy,
Now THAT’s entertainment! lol -you’re awesome! ;-) (giggle)
I think I speak for many of us when I say how wonderful it is that you share so many aspects of yourself with us. You not only give us great advice and support but I think even more endearing is the fact that you also share some of your hopes and aspirations along with your disappointments. This is very comforting as we share our vulnerabilities with you and makes us feel strangely connected to you as a coach. Even though you don’t know us, you make us feel we know you. It’s a gift, I think I can say, we all appreciate immensely.
Thank you as always,
K
PS-Looked like you where really enjoying the “role playing”-(wink-lol-had to bug, it’s what I do)
PPS-Another thought, I think it’s time to lose the yellow tie and move beyond lemonade. You have a whole bar of drinks yet to create Hussey. Bring out the mixer and shake it up as only you can!
(K, maybe it’s just me who isn’t a fan of the yellow tie??)
Love your videos! I already got the guy (married 11 yrs) but ready your blog, watching your videos, and reading your book has helped me improve our relationship. Your advice goes so much deeper than just how to get a guy but really how to live your life. You really make a difference…keep up the amazing work!
Thanks for sharing your insight Matthew–and nice threads–looking sharp!
For me what I learned after watching The Great Gatsby was two fold, one being inspired by the production and costume design and the use of color and texture in the movie…and secondly, thinking about Gatsby’s hope in life and how in his generosity he loved others…to not always gain it in return. This world as a whole may not always understand one’s choices and they may not return back to you fully what you give out—but in the end, if one lives a life of fullness of hope, love, joy, and vision for their life than regardless of return, those things are return enough for the person.
That is what I was thinking through after I saw the film.
Lastly, thank you very much for what you share, I have found your insight very helpful and it has been a part of different things I am learning right now and growing in about how I see myself, others, love, and relationships—
so, THANK YOU AGAIN!!!!
Thanks for the great Gatsby video! I agree with (most) everyone else Matt, loved the yellow tie and white coat–very sexy. Perfect setting too. I love how you reference current movies–wondering what you would create with reference to Iron Man ;)
I loved seeing Gatsby’s schedule. Your video moved me to get out of bed this morning and find the planner I bought months ago. When I opened my planner, I was amused; it only had one entry. It started out like this:
Thursday May 9, 2013
9:00 start yoga
Matthew Hussey–sign up [for Get the Guy in Seattle]
Read…
I got on this website for the 1st time the week before because I was impressed by your words (and wardrobe) on Ready for Love :) I was ecstatic to see you would be in Seattle soon. I’d been meaning to sign up and finally did that day. You put on a great event! Not only did I learn as I anticipated, but I also was happily surprised to be moved both literally and figuratively. I’m inspired by what you have accomplished, what you provide through your work, how you overdeliver and who you are. I was touched when you said that you’re motivated by what you want to provide your family (including your future family). My biggest problem is staying motivated week to week.
So today I made a plan, which started out:
Yoga
Comment on GTG blog
B’s BBQ
I went to the BBQ specifically because of your advice & I’m happy I did. I met new friends and they have other friends they want me to meet. So, I just wanted to say thanks Matt, because of your work I had a great day and plan on having more :)
Next, which is the best takeaway from Gatsby, I will make my plan for tomorrow.
Fondly,
Stephanie or you could keep referring to me as ‘Lovely’ ;)
Eugh! That’s your worst video ever … I was waiting for the authentic self-deprecating lovable Matthew to pop out from behind that silly cocktail glass. Seriously, is this what a tour of America does to a great guy? My toes are still curling Matthew, stop it right now. Think you may need a reality check from your brother…
Maybe you need to de-tox from cheesy US style celebritydom. Otherwise, usually, love your stuff. Everyone has an ‘off’ moment. Who cares about the Great Gatsby, bring back the Great Matthew, and burn the jacket! Hugs.
Lmao I laugh so hard and loud when I watch that video.
I think you’re missing the point. He’s teaching you something and having fun! Guys r … Like I said … Cooler than girls! Lol
I was laughing too. (Or pretty close to it.)
That was hilarious. As an American, if we taught you to lighten up and have some fun then mission accomplished. It was light and cheeky and the message was just as effective. Bravo.
lol..yes you can tell Matthew just wanted to have some fun. He truly enjoys his job! All I could think is wow..he looks good in that outfit besides What can I take from this vid and the fact that it was water in a martini glass.
Hey Joanne,
Hopefully if you watch it again (which I’m pretty sure you won’t ever by the sounds of it lol) you’ll see that I was poking fun of myself in this video. My aim was purely to give some important lessons in a light hearted way. I apologise that it wasn’t outwardly self deprecating enough for you. I don’t want to be known as the person who does predictable things every time – sits in front of a camera, gives and message, and then says bye. I pride myself on being creative, thinking a little outside the box, and having fun.
I think what’s interesting about life is that what you consider to be an ‘off moment’ for me, was what many other people considered to be one of my greatest videos in a long time. Some even thought it was my best. It’s an important lesson for us all in life, that while one person can be telling you you’re doing a bad job, you can actually be doing something that other people love, if you just have the courage to stay the course.
Obviously it didn’t work for you on this particular vid Joanne, and that’s cool. But I think it’s important to remember something: In your life there will be risks you want to take, things you want to try, and spontaneous ways you want to have fun, and the greatest challenge will be trying to remain unaffected by the person who is waiting to tell you it’s ‘your worst video ever’ as soon as you try it. I hope that the next time you try something different you don’t have to face the wrath of someone telling you you need a reality check.
Nonetheless, I can assure you I appreciate you taking the time to leave your thoughts. I look forward to making your toes uncurl (or not!) in the next video : )
M x
So funny you posted this!! When I watched the film I was thinking what can I take away from this and my conclusion was that he was a little cray cray and sometimes we all get that way at which point we need to step back and re-evaluate our lives and how we can do things different/better. Loved the movie now I gotta get the book. Yes, I was that one person who didn’t have to read the book in school but I think I will appreciate better now:)
Thanks for sharing! Super useful and super clear!!!
☀☆♥☆☀ Dear Matthew Hussey ☀☆♥☆☀
Incredibly warm-hearted lovely wonderful charming handsome Matthew Hussey ♥&♥
truly heart-touching videos & blog : Looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove
Looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove
Looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove
All veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeery much :)
Thank you veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeery much for all the best :)
All the best kisses :)
Susanne
Loooooooooooooooooooooove Gatsby’s “Be better to parents”:
When I was a little girl I gave my parents 10-20 goodnight kisses each night :)
♥&♥ still Loooooooooooooooooooooove goodnight kisses :)
On a very abstract level, the way this video was conducted portraits a Hussey version of Gatsby’s’ lack of touch with reality aka the “unreality of reality”. Wow Matt! This video was definitely not a lemon.
I’ve got to say it is a refreshing and entertaining video in so many ways. lol The only bémol was the kitchen soap ;)) and you look dashing with this tie.
P.S. I too use those magic sticky notes for my weekly “to do lists”:D
btw, I love that little moment of emotion written on your face at 2:00, it showed that you too, are driven by a woman. Your mother primarily but perhaps also others… Body language can tell a lot but fortunately for us not everything :)
what if you are not so popular ?
LOL Matthew, I was taking a break from my study and I’m happy I decided to watch this video, the end is the best! You made me laugh! Well done. This video is sure one of the best videos of yours.
Sendin’ xx Joanna. :)
Great video. Matthew – one thing I’ve noticed in trying out your techniques for flirting in daily life is that people in modern times hardly make eye contact anymore! It’s hard to catch someone’s eye when people hardly look at someone anymore. Any thoughts?
funny while playing Candy Crush your email arrives, stop briefly and very amazing to read.
Seems I’m inlove with you Mathew your face is sooo cute.
take care pls. kissss :P
Hi,
Just wanted to say that I think the idea of throwing parties/events is a good one. I’m not the most outgoing person, but I do enjoy throwing parties/hosting and being a connector, so my cousin and I are def going to take this lesson from Gatsby and apply it. Hopefully, something good comes of it.
I am following you for a while now, even attend an event in Brighton, when I had to travel special for this gathering. I have learned so much from you and this new way of addressing your inner greatness that need to be released of Gatsby is important as well. In one of your videos you mention your adventure in China, had encouraged me to learn dealing with new unknown frightening situations.
Your strength and creativeness inspire us all. Women from all races.