Is there something you’ve been wanting to do but are worried what other people may think of you?
A trip away? A new hairstyle? A new hobby?
In this week’s video, I give you 3 tricks to help you from having other people’s opinions hold you back. Enjoy!
Hi Matt,
I just recently booked my space for your High Value Women Retreat and I’m very excited about that obviously. Still, there are parts of me that are worried about it, because I don’t know what’s going to happen. And I haven’t told my family or friends about it either.
I have taken trips abroad and my family was always against it. But only trough travelling and pushing boundaries I could learn how to grow as a person. I am still worried that they do not approve of the path I have chosen for my life and don’t accept me as I am. At the same time I want to accept myself and love myself for the unique being that I am.
It is not that easy, as I have learned over the years to mistrust myself and therefore am always worried about making the wrong choices and decisions in life…
Matt,
I was scared for years to go away on these women’s outdoor weekends because no one would go with me, eventually I said screw it, I really want to go! I now make new friends every year while having an amazing time. Don’t be afraid of other people’s judgments, just do what makes you happy. Pushing past your comfort zone brings on amazing confidence.
Hello Matt,
You ll ask for a comment, so here is my comment!
I m a french student. I m at the library taking a “Matt break”. I love all your videos, even if I don t comment them. Everything you say is so interessting and stimulating. It enables be to ask myself the good qestions.
I love this video too, because I have so many business idea, but my classmates keep on saying that “business takes to much time, and the probability to succeed is weak” and I am tired to hear that. Thanks for your advices and keep being with us :) (Sorry for my bad english haha)
hello matt
im soo worry about my carrier i have an issue with taking a decision on my life ? any decision since a long time ago i take a decision and anyone can see how i am excited abd then i said no no its not me even now i have to take a decision for study abroad i want to go to australia and i want to go to japan and i have to choose i dont know what can i do , another things i want to study in collage next year photographie and psycologie i love both of them , the end of the story i feel confuse plz tell me matt can u help me with that
Dear Matthew I so sorry that I never give any comment so far but from now on I will do therefore I have to take my responsibility too. Every Video that I watch from your as my coach it is so important when I apply. and for this one yes you are right why should we worried about somebody idea that have disturbed our mind.Let get out of this fear and just forget what people say the important thing is what should you do to overcome with every fear that has come to you, I am from Cambodia from the country which I face a lot of trouble with what people has said now I am a free woman of FEAR.
Hi there,
This one hits home and I have written it down in my little MH Tips notebook!
I am one of those people who in the past has always looked for approval from others before moving forward. I didn’t even know I was doing it and through listening to you I have really grown and become aware of these little personality blocks. I am gradually freeing myself from them. The funny thing is, its upsetting lots of people around me who like to take control, but I am becoming a force to be reconned with in a quiet non domineering way. I can’t tell you how good that feels :-)
My example of a thing I wanted to do that others don’t approve of is listening to you your videos and buying your programs. Lots of people dont approve, what are his credentials?? You might get brainwashed, you need to be carefull of these people… it goes on! I have a psycotherapist friend who is especially disapproving, I suspect because its steps on her toes! I just smile and carry on.
Thank you Matt.
Katherine x
MH tip book! I like that idea, Katherine! I’m working on negative inner voices, confidence and self-esteem so this video is helpful. Grateful for the insights of your video Matthew and the comments of your followers. :)
Love the very practical tip.
Actually, I recently used a different one. There’s this thing I want to learn, it’s a bit unusual and implies getting some equipment. I already knew I would be facing resistance – even saying “I’m really curious” would not cut it, as they would most likely reply – well, how expensive is that curiosity?
So I’ve set myself this goal to learn this new thing, but I am keeping it to myself. I’ve bought one piece of equipment, saving up for the big one. As I’m saving up and learning about my new interest every day, I’m getting more and more excited and focused.
The reason I chose this approach is that I want to use all my energy on reaching that goal. I’ll share it with people in a few months, once I’m actuallly playing the thing. When it’s a done deal, they’ll probably make their usual comments, but they’ll also see (maybe not, but it doesn’t matter) how much I thought this through and how I’m enjoying myself doing this particular hobby.
I also wanted to test the principle that once you share a goal to the world, and it feels great… just like you’d actually done it, you are less likely to do it. I usually share my goals, and to be honest, I’m not always the best at following through until the end.
Keeping it a secret has its own special vibe and energy to it.
Like all tips, you have to know yourself and your “audience” and pick the right approach.
Hi Matt,
I’ve been watching and subscribing to your product for a few years now. I’m a successful NYC business woman and have learned a lot of practical skills from you! For me, it’s not about men, although the advice always helps, but it’s more about life coaching… I would love to see more about living an inspiring life….as you get to a certain level of success so much gets in the way that it is too easy to get thrown off course.
Thanks!
C
Matt !!!! Keep rockin the videos man!! Much love from the East Coast, 902 Maritimes buddy! Even my boyfriend appreciates what you do, we watched ReadyFor Love a couple years ago, he’ll never admit to his crust punk friends it was our secret ” guilty pleasure” TV drama! Xxxo
Thank you Matt For these helpful and in site full videos.
I agree with you Re: your tip about coming alongside the person.
Along with each video I recommend a printout out sheet.
Great information Matthew.
As Always, good advice from mr Hussey :-) I’d like to know how to respond to the question ‘but why ARE you still single?’ I feel like I have to defend myself a lot, and it’s like ripping open a wound every time, cos I don’t know the answer. Men who I am not into flock to me like moth to a flame and men I fancy I somehow scare off.. Saying ‘I just haven’t met mr right yet doesn’t seem to help.. Maybe you have some good tips on how to respond to those questions. They tell me that the ONLY reason MUST be that I’m too fussy.. but that’s not the case.
Love/Heidi x
Hey Matt, thank you for inviting us to comment. I usually see that kind of thing as weird self-promotion that I would be uncomfortable doing myself… I would think I was asking people for attention that they didn’t want to give. But really, I’ve recently realized that I don’t ‘comment’ in life. I don’t generally engage with others at all. So just reminding me that yeah, I could leave a comment on this video, helped me to open up to life today. Thanks so much for this and all of your other content. Love, Emma
Hi Emma,
I decided to leave a comment because of what you wrote. You are right and I was moved by what you said. Go get’em! :)
When I was part of a meditation group, it was something my family extremely disapproved of, AND I totally over-defended it. I really like the advice to agree or concede one or two point as potential concerns. Thank you!
In highschool when I was younger and less confident, one day I decided to bring my giraffe shaped pencil-box to class. It was not without hesitation (thinking about what my classmates would say or the risk of looking childish) but I decided to do it anyway. Whenever I took out the pencil-box I was a bit tentative, feeling insecure. Although that feeling vanished one specific day during a class in religion: The teacher was talking about courage and daring to do what you feel is right even though it means walking against the stream. Then she pointed at my pencil-box and declared “Only a courageous person would dare to have one of those.” After that incident I felt proud when I brought my giraffe pencil-box with me.
Fit.
Hi Matt,
I never leave comments under videos, in fact I always think that nobody cares to read my opinion since I am not reading others. But when I am on your blog I actually do, out of curiosity, read other women’s responses and they are always great! I wanted to congratulate you on creating such a lovely and friendly community of women.
I am currently looking for a job and constantly stress if I should talk about it with people because I am too afraid of what they might think, now that I am looking at it, this period of my life doesn’t define me. I am so much more than just a woman looking for a job.
Thank you!
Thank you Matt, these types of videos (topics) are my favorite! I like your dating/relationship tips. But as you always say, to work on ourselves will make our love life much better.
Recently, I’ve been trying to go out of my “comfort-zone” and do activities I’ve never even thought I’d be doing someday. One of them is cooking, I’ve been interested in cooking my whole life, and when I tried it, I’m starting to like it and found a new “talent” in me.. I’ve been afraid at first to cook for my family, but they were supportive. They were shocked at first haha.
I’ve always liked dancing, but this week I decided to learn a new type of dancing, it was a little hard and tricky, and I received some mocking from family members .. saying that it’s impossible for me to master this type of dancing. I’m not saying I cared much about their comments, but your tips gave me an idea of how to deal with them.
Thank you Matt, Love!
Faizah
Thank you Matt. Your tips are great. I would really love for you to visit NY/NJ area soon. I would live to attend one of your seminars in person. Hope you will be around soon.
Thank you for all the advice you are providing for us.
Stephanie
I have expended A TON of energy defending myself when other people judge my decisions. This video gives some excellent advice. I need to apply it more often in my life.
I am a huge geek. I used to try to hide this part of myself and defend myself when people would judge me for being a geek. However, due to the example of a friend I recently made the decision to embrace my geekiness instead of defending it. I joined a fan club and went to Comic Con wearing a costume. I had a blast, and it was so liberating!
I learned a few things from this experience:
1) When you let people tease you it can actually endear you to them, especially if you don’t defend yourself, or better yet join in the teasing.
2) Most of the people who have teased me for being a geek are actually a lot more geeky than they would probably be willing to admit.
3) When I embraced my geeky side I gained a whole new group of geeky friends, and they became the perfect support group in the face of any teasing.
4) By defending myself I was sucking some of my own personal enjoyment from activities that gave me joy. Every time I watched Doctor Who or Star Trek I was partially ashamed. Now that I don’t feel the need to defend myself, my shame has also gone away. I can watch my favorite shows confidently and with pride.
5) The people who tease me have no idea what amazing experiences they are missing out on. I spent so many years not living life for fear of ridicule. The many amazing experiences I have had since I decided to embrace instead of defend my geeky nature far outweigh the occasional ribbing I get.
This is such great advice! Matt’s videos are always great. I am so lucky that I have stumbled on the many truly amazing videos, blog posts, and books that Matt and Steve have created. They are truly life changing.