Is He Too Hot For You?

Do you ever feel that when you walk into a room you’re having to compete with other women to get a guy’s attention? Do you ever have the fear that you’re being overshadowed by other, more attractive women? Or even that when you look at a hot guy, you feel he’s ‘out of your league’?

In today’s video I talk about these feelings and discuss the answer to a question that I know you ask yourself in the depths of these deeply insecure moments…

Is he too hot for me?

If you enjoyed that, my brother Stephen (who co-wrote the Get The Guy book with me) posted an article on the blog this week that’s a fantastic compliment to this video. It’s called ‘What Men *Really* Want‘, and further explains how looks aren’t everything (with the opposing view of looking at yourself in being attractive to others).

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50 Replies to “Is He Too Hot For You?”

  • Matt, Thanks, that was an eye-opener… One comment though..

    “Guys, (…) get laid”

    “women, (…)get into relationships”

    Why did you put it like that? it comes across as stereotypical…

    other than that, great! confidence boost to the max :)

  • ☆♥♥♥ :)HEART BEATS :) ♥♥♥☆

    With all my heart I thank you for everything beautiful you said :)

    May I say:
    I loooooooooooooooooooooooooooove everything you said :)
    You truly touch my heart with your message :)

    To meet Mr.Right who is so so so so so incredibly amazingly oh truly hot :

    I looooooooooooooooooooooooove this thought ♥&♥ I’ll keep it in my heart :)

    If I meet Mr.Right, one of the most heart-touching moments in my life, I’ll thank God for creating him with so so so so so much LOVE ♥&♥ I’ll enjoy this heart-touching moment with him ♥&♥ RELAX IN PEACE :)

    May God bless this special heart-touching day :)

    ♥&♥ May Mr.Right see I’m so so so so so incredibly amazingly oh truly hot too: My heart, mind and everything God gave me with true LOVE :)

    Oh I’m so so so so so looking forward to this heart-touching day :)♥&♥ to date myself again :)

    ♥♥♥ Heart-touching LOVE :) ♥♥♥


    1. I loooooooooooooove the way you said RELAX :)
      Thank God you are so so so so so warm-hearted :)

      Hope everybody can enjoy the most heart-touching moments in life ♥&♥ relax so incredibly well after reading your blog ♥&♥ watching your video :)

      A beautiful thank you for your amazing Sunday warmth :)
      May the amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing lifecoach enjoy his day too : In the best way :))))))))))

          1. Please don’t say harsh words to people just because they’re nice and being themselves
            Ew. Maybe before calling people names look at yourself being rude.

  • Love the location change of the last two videos… If you can’t literally wake up on a Sunday morning with Matthew Hussey in his bedroom, I guess this is the next best thing!

  • What is ‘hot’ or good looking as we say in England.

    I say is not so much about having the bone structure of Johnny Depp but about the man being healthy and holding good posture. A glowing completion, clear eyes etc. NOT smelling of cigarettes or too much boy perfume and so on. This denotes the ‘high value’ Matt has been speaking about.

  • I need to watch this video every week. I get stressed out about what to say but in the end it’s just about making a connection.

  • Sounds like great news. I have 2 friends I go out with they always get the guys attention. Some people tell me I’m intimidating! Hm I don’t get it

  • I just wanted to say I followed your advice from this video today & ended up w/ a date this Friday.

    I went to my gym at a different time than I normally go & saw a new guy I found attractive. I followed your tips on how to look, look-away, etc. & was getting some IOI’s in return. I wanted to be “easy” for the first ten seconds, so I took out my headphones & continued my workout on a bench closer to his bench. He moved his workout to the bench right next to mine. We were both exchanging quick looks in the mirror between sets & I kept thinking “What do I say??” Then I remembered this video I watched yesterday & did the simple thing: After getting a little off-balance during some one-legged Romanian Deadlifts, I just said “Whoa, sorry. I don’t want to fall on you,” to which he replied “Oh, don’t worry about it. I’d catch you anytime!” We had a great exchange (during which I used some more of your lines & tips) & he asked me out to a comedy club this weekend. Is he Mr. Right? Eh, maybe. Probably not. But I don’t care; I’m having too much fun collecting dates by following your tips! Thanks, Matt!

  • Need to ask from a man’s point of view . How do men define/ differentiate any girl being – sexy versus hot verses beautiful . Who stands a better chance with men of those 3 kind of females ? U will shoot me down with your words if i say this to u- i have fallen for this guy who is seeing all 3 kinds of girls all at the same time … And yes unfortunately i am one of them – the sexy one

  • “Guys = get laid”
    “Women = meaningful relationships”

    I understand you were just shooting out generalities in the heat of the moment, but it’s really discouraging when you say all this positive stuff to women about creating meaning and value, but in the moment you address male viewers you cheapen women to mere conquests. Call me over sensitive, but I’m going to say what I think.

  • Took this on board when I first saw this a few months ago. I thought ‘this is easy – my problems are over’. But practice makes perfect. Just joined this social club which had an open day a few days ago. Good opportunity to meet other members. Whilst I was there this really nice guy who belongs to this club was with another guy, both walking in my direction. This really nice guy appeared also to be looking in my direction and smiling. He may have just been in conversation with this other guy and just idly looking around. What did I do? Forgot everything. Looked at this guy, got tongue tied and walked off. Kicked myself a bit, but then laughed as it’s just typical of me. Won’t forget that message again, tho’.

  • Great video, so true! I think it’s all about accepting yourself and loving yourself for who you are. Not for who you want to be or for who you think the other person would love you. I used to think I did until I saw a hot guy on the train, 30’s, in a suit and though, ‘nah, he wouldn’t go for me’. Then I realised I actually thought there were men I thought were out of my league! Now, just to clarify, what I am constantly being told, every day, by random guys, by men I know is that I am hot. So shouldn’t I be more confident? But confidence has nothing to do with your looks, it’s to do with accepting who you are and loving yourself for that. People who don’t love themselves attract other people who don’t love themselves, who look to others to fill that void and that’s how you get all of those disastrous relationships you’ve had so far. So no, he’s not too hot for you. No one is out of your league, just accept that.

  • T h a n k y o u ! :D

    We put too much pressure on ourselves and get stuck inside our heads so often… Matthew, you voicing all the things I know but need to hear out loud is such a precious gift to me. I am feeling a lot happier in my life in the past month, BECAUSE of your advice.

    Thank you for being the voice. :)

  • This is very true! We tend to put people on a pedestal because usually we see something in them we think we are lacKing. When we know that we are similar(or equal) with regard to eg. intelligence or kindness then even if we like the person we do not have the’I am not good enough for him/her’ mentality and the relationship unfolds more organically..

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