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How to Become Invincible

Continuing with the theme of taking lessons from movies, here’s something that really struck a chord with me from Ironman 3

If you are confident at your core, nothing else matters.

So many of us rely on external trappings to feel confident. For some of us it’s our car or our house, for others it’s our job.

The danger in deriving confidence from these things however is that it could all be taken away from us tomorrow.

We need to find a way of gaining confidence that isn’t dependent on things around us.

We are the greatest asset we’ll ever have.

We are the thing that we should feel confident about on a core level.

The line that summed this up for me in the film was this:

“My suit wasn’t a hobby, it wasn’t a distraction, it was a cocoon. You could take away my tricks, you could take away my toys, you could take away my house, but there’s one thing you can’t take away… I AM Ironman.”

In life, never take at face value how confident people seem.

Most people who seem confident are really just basing their worth on things that could be taken away.

How many people do you know who could stand strong in the knowledge that they are their greatest asset?

I told you in a recent video the story of having to face up to this myself with the show – something I’d worked on for over year – being taken off the air.

I had to step up and say to myself, you can take away the show, you can take away everything that came with it… but so long as I have my voice and I can do my thing, I’m the asset.

It doesn’t matter what gets taken away. The thing that gives you real confidence is who you are at your core.

Don’t base your confidence on what you’re achieving. Build your confidence in such a way that if you were to lose everything, you could still feel amazing.

*If you want to learn how to do this, I have a program that could be for you.*

This has been one of the big, passionate subjects of my career. It’s something that I consider to be more important than anything else, and something that I’ve built an entire program around the concept of.

If you want to learn how to develop real core confidence and how to become invincible wherever you are in life, then this might be for you.

The program is the High Value Retreat and I have two booked for the rest of the year and that’s it.

The first is in Clearwater Florida in September, the second in Palm Springs in December.

You have to apply, and if you’d like to do so or find out more about the process, you can here. There’s a video where I cover all of the event details and a chance to enquire about the application process.

Check it out, and who knows, we could be spending 5 days together later this year…

Question of the day:

If you could have any one superpower, what would it be and why? My pick would be the ability to stop time – it would be an unbelievable amount of fun! Let me know yours in the comments!

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147 Replies to “How to Become Invincible”

  • :) Your amazing and your advice always comes at the right time! Keep doing what you do we love you x andddd my susperpower would be having the ability to read minds!

      1. Matthew! I am so glad to know you as a human existence! I’ve learned and keep learning SO many things from you! Great to have you back! Take care <3

  • Love it…..the setting, the humor, I love it all. Matt, you’re that ‘friend’, that I can catch up with on a Sunday morning, while I’m waiting on a load of laundry. Take care!

  • I loved this. Thanks for the reminder. It’s funny to see the direction of your videos. They are now more in your bedroom and now the clothes are getting more comfy.
    Are you going to appear in a Ironman onesie next? That is a dare :))))

      1. On the contrary! I loved this outfit! Looks so comfy and “friendly”. I’m not that into Gatsby outfit, or suits with bow tie. They look good on you, but I like more your casual look :)

  • Matt,

    I think is enough and time to stop to talk about the show… Come on, you are great even without it.., if you talk about it all over again, even in a way that it doesn’t bother you, it looks bit pathetic ;) So just forget about it and be youself!

    1. Hey Agnes,

      As much as I love getting up on a Sunday morning and reading the word ‘pathetic’ in reference to something I’ve done or said, I’m sure you realize it was just an example to make today’s point ; )


  • Most people have toxic shame wich relates a lot to the point you were doing.Do you know something about this matter?

    And by the way, I love your cupid vesion of you. Give the person that draw you that one extra book or something like that in reward to be such a good fan.

    And don´t worry about the TV show. When one door closes an other open. Who knows what else may the future have for you…

  • Hey Matthew i make this rhyme for you i’m not good at it but i gave it a try it Goes like this: Hey Dear Matthew your a man with alott of words but when it comes to women you say the right Things first. Your loyal and Nice what more can i say? If someone makes a negative comment i’ll be on my way. I’m not the person That your gonna notice. Am not the most beautiful girl in the World my beauty is inside that’s why i make this ryhme. Your a good matchmaker you should make a match for me. I’m living in the Netherlands why me? So Matthew could you make a match for me? I should say please come to the Netherlands what more can i say?not Amsterdam but Landgraaf if That’s okay? Than you should take a look of our beautiful country. Now can i say make a ryhme of my name if That’s okay?

    So what do you say of this Ryhme it came out of my heart. ;)

    Lovely Greetz Thirza from the Netherlands ;)

  • My one super power would be illusion-to create a space into an entirely different one like the jungle, the ocean or another place where I’ve traveled (or imagined), kind of like a free standing hologram- because I have an easier time showing people with my drawings instead of words.

    Aww, I love how the young boy comes out of you near the end of this video! ;)

  • Matthew, you are so uplifting and passionate and fun! You have brought so many ah ha moments to me and I appreciate your hard work and wisdom.
    My question for you is WHY would you like to be able to stop time, and why you think it would be fun and interesting!

    1. Glad I can create those ‘ah ha’ moments for you Christine! To answer your question on the nice & sweet side, I think we just get so jostled in the hustle and bustle of everyday that it would be nice to be able to freeze a moment to enjoy it and really just fall in love with it. On the more fun side though, I’m sure you could get a little cheeky in what you could do when time is stopped ; ) Thanks for your comment!


  • So funny at the end. XD
    I don’t think I know anyone who would be confident after taking everything they have away from them. There are so many people who just base their confidence on their appearance. I’m not so confident, but I do base it on my knowledge and some of my other traits, other than my appearance too. I guess I’m on the right track. ;)
    The superpower I would love to have is control over time (stop it, rewind, forward). I’m even writing a story with a heroine who has this power and is based on me. She’s not perfect, but she’s evolving through time. Writing this story also helps me get to know myself and all of the things I’m afraid of, so I can finally face my fears. When I finish the story I might send it to you, because you helped me get through so many things. So thank you, Matthew! :D

    1. Thanks Barbara! The support from people like you helps. It’s so nice to know i can always come back here and make videos that people love and appreciate.

      Basing your confidence on knowledge and other traits is a good start. The next step is basing it on really have a great relationship with yourself! Once you care about yourself, everything follows.

      Thanks for commenting lovely!


      1. Thanks for answering and calling me lovely! :) I’ll definitely try even harder now to accept myself with all my faults and virtues. I hope I can one day tell you the story of how I found a great guy. Until then! :P xo

  • When I first saw the title I thought it said “How to Become INVISIBLE”, so I’m going to go with that for my superpower. Or maybe being able to read and retain the information in a book just by looking at it. Super time saver…

  • Your great stuff keeps me pumped up, especially the videos on confidence. In essence, it is my core confidence I have had to work on. For whatever reason, it was seriously damaged when I was a child. I would love to go to one of your retreats, but it’s not on the possibility list right now. But, I really missed you when you weren’t blogging, so it’s great to see your new stuff. (And great to have another video to watch again when you don’t blog.)

    Have a great week, Matt. :D

    1. Hey Trudy!

      Not anytime soon, just florida and palm springs for now! If I do more programmes than I already am I might not have a voice by the time I’m 50 lol

      : ) x

  • Superpower? I dunno. I’m greedy lol so it would be similar to Rogue’s superpower, where I can absorb the abilites and life stories of others to make me stronger. Think it would make for some awesome storytelling and songs. =) Happy early birthday btw, Hussey =)

    1. Rogue did have a pretty epic superpower, but don’t forget to go out and make some experiences and life stories yourself ; ) Thanks for the comment and the early birthday wish Toi, so sweet!


  • This is really inspiring!
    Thank God I’ve found you, Matt! ^^ Not only did you teach us how to get the guy, most importantly is that you gave us advice on life and how to have the right mindset.

    I love people who are passionate in what they do. Really, love it! Keep it up!

  • This post…the Great Gatsby post…your words somewhere about how some people get addicted to just one part of their personality, but we need to show all the richly varied sides of our personalities…all connected.
    You are dressing in different ways to show US the richness/complexity of your personality.

  • Matthew!!! I told you this at your Dallas seminar, but it is worth repeating over and over again: ERES SENSACIONAL!!! Love your material, love your humor, love your personality, your energy, your charisma, your charm, and the list goes on!! I’ve told all my friends about your book and they’re hooked! Keep it coming!!! Also, I am determined to attend one of your retreats. I won’t be able to do it this year because I have a couple marathons lined up during that time, but put me on the list for 2014! I WILL BE THERE! (I’ve taken a pic of this as a reminder;) Grande abrazo y te deseo mucho éxito SIEMPRE!!!

  • Hello from Brazil again!
    I really enjoy watching your videos.. you’re so funny!! :)

    If I could have super powers, I’d pick the ability to go back time and change the past. But just thinking about it I remembered another movie ” The butterfly effect”. The male character played by Ashton Kutcher used to go back and change everything he considered to be wrong, but his actions also changed the course of his future making things worse.

    I think the real message here is: Learn from your mistakes in the past, so you can become a greater person in the future.

    I will end in a Brazilian way:

    Beijos ( kisses) ;)

    1. Wow Brazil! Really making a good showing here! Great superpower, and great film, but yes for those of us who can’t go back in time we must learn and appreciate our previous experiences : )


  • I’ve been following you for awhile, but this post actually resonated with me. I grew up in a cult, got married young, dedicated my life to it. I worked part-time for over a decade so I could do 100 hours a month of volunteer work for them. My husband was an elder. A few years ago, I decided I had to leave because I didn’t believe in the cause I was promoting and had been programmed to believe in since I was a baby. My husband left me. Every friend I’d ever had shunned me. My own family won’t speak to me. I ended up homeless, friendless, jobless, alone. So I can relate to the “strip everything away and see who I still am” idea.

    1. Margaux, I really admire your bravery in sharing your story with us. I’m so happy we’ve created an environment where people like yourself can express themselves without fear of being judged and can have a mindset to grow. Being here is the first step in creating your new and exciting future! Thanks for your support, and know that we’re here to help you every step of the way : )


  • Hi Matt, my superpower would be to make one wish come true for the people I love…me included! :) x

      1. Thank you! To plagiarise (bending a bit) Al Pacino in “Scent of a Woman”… ‘I am in the lovely business!’ :) x

  • I’ve been following you for awhile but this blog really resonated with me. I lost everything I ever had overnight, my husband, my friends, my belief system, my family. I ended up homesless, friendless, jobless and alone after dedicating my life to a cause I just could no longer believe in. So there was nothing left for me to feel any kind of confidence in…except myself.

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