Why You REALLY Need to Stop Caring What Other People Think

When I first started coaching at 18 years old, people had a LOT to say about why a kid like me thought he could tell people anything about dating. Over TEN years on and after reaching millions of people around the world, people STILL throw out their criticisms.

I had a viral video hit this week (over 16 million views in three days!), and sure enough, many of my new followers said: “Who the hell is this Matthew Hussey and why should I listen to what this young guy has to say??”

Comments like that used to worry me. These days, I smile and say: “Ah, this again.”

But if you’re STILL living in fear of the opinions of others, this is the video is for you…

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48 Replies to “Why You REALLY Need to Stop Caring What Other People Think”

    1. I think your comment kind of emphasises his point haha. He can swear in his videos because it’s his decision to make. He’s obviously done it for a reason and that is none of our damn business :)

    2. Agree Wendy. While I don’t particularly care for it, It keeps me from sharing his work with other people.
      When I have naysayers in my business I just look them straight in the eye and say: “Awww…. Well bless your little heart.” It’s the most classic way to say F.O. with out actually saying it. And EVERYBODY knows what your saying. :)

  • Matt, please keep doing what you are doing for at least a year, I’ve got a small baby now so I can’t join your events. But you are the very reason I have this baby because you saved my marriage! Now things are great and that’s just after watching your videos, I cannot even imagine what it would be like if I ever attended one of your retreats. You are an angel sent to us from above! God bless your parents and the rest of your family!!!

  • You are so passionate about helping others it’s ridiculous
    I can’t thank you enough for the support you have given me over the past years

    Your friend, supporter, admirer


  • Awesome! Thank you so much Matthew. I really need to take up this advice.
    At 51, I am following my dreams of being a Holistic Practitioner, but after 9 professional qualifications, I still hold back as some people think what I do is woo woo stuff.
    I REALLY need to express myself as eloquently as you do.
    Very cathartic!!
    Thanks again :)

  • Actually- I think it’s terrific that you started so young Matthew..it means you are a motivated man with a lot of room for growth- both personally and professionally. You are a spot on relationship advisor!

  • Brilliant advice.
    I was a doubter at first but you PROVED yourself to me, and gained my trust.
    But please stop hard selling the retreat so often because it’s so out of reach for most people and always in the USA.

  • Matthew, thank you. I really needed that kick up the ar*e! Can’t wait for the Retreat – see you soon!

  • You Rock Matthew Hussey! I am so glad I went to The Retreat! It was a life-changing experience…& I met the best people…You, All your support staff…& the amazing ladies I met….I am so glad I did it for myself..
    The only thing I missed…was meeting your Mum…but, due to the circumstances…totally understand…;) <3 Cheers!

  • Hey Matt, you are GREAT! I appreciate you so much! You’ve helped me in my personal life as well as in my love life. You can’t please everybody, and I’m so happy you started coaching :) Whoever doesn’t like whatever they can work their own issues. I’m using your confidence notes to be able to start my own business now. And i found a great guy! So: YOU ROCK! x

  • Matt, don’t lower your own standard with the unnecessary swearing. You’re so articulate you can get your strength of feeling across without it,

  • I loved this video and I love your videos where you step away from dating and move into other fields. I am not saying I don’t like your dating / relationship videos. I DO!!! but these others are really great. I guess I am learning that when you are a whole person the dating stuff falls into place more easily and effortlessly. (:-)
    Thank you – you have really inspired me the past 3 months.

  • Thanks. When I first separated from my ex husband And was in the process of my divorce, he’d already moved in with a new woman and I found myself feeling guilty about dating again. I felt like I was cheating on him and when we were married he had an opinion on everything I said or did. Even while we were divorcing he’d tell me what a fool I was making of myself and how no one would want me. For a long time I still unconsciously ran everything I did through his filter, and held back on my life. Then it was the court. He’d threaten to use any wrong move I made in the court to try and get my child away so I lived like an angel for fear of anything being twisted and used sgainst me. I just booksd a trip to europe w my daughter and even now I heard in my head his criticism of how can I afford it and if I can then why ishe paying child support. But then i pushed his “two cents” out of my head and said I really dont care whst he thinks. You just helped me remind myself of that. I will def think about coming to your retreat

  • Hi Matthew

    I heard this quote just this week…
    HOW YOU SEE ME, HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ME, it has everything to do with you’

    If only we could all have TRUE ‘self love’ I think it’s something that is so hard to achieve but it’s something that would make us and all of our relationships so much happier. if you have that belief and happiness within, you don’t need to look to anyone else to give it to you/complete you. PLEASE write a book on that Matthew (it could be called ‘Find Yourself First, then Get the Guy’ :)… I will be your first customer :)

  • Hi Matt and team,

    I think people are extremely scared about not fitting in and being alone. I am from a happy, stable and strong socio-economic background. Everyday I see people worrying about what other people think. fiends, family and colleagues!

    I am a very confident person. My person goal is to be ashamed of what I do and how I do it.
    If people do not know me then they do not see me a kind, caring and approachable. They now I friendly and fun-loving but they will not come and have fun with me and my friends.

    When you care too much of what other people think, then you run the rick of not having insight and the ability of how to read a situation.

    Congratulations on your viral video!

    P.S. Fuck in my mother tongue translated means subject like a school subject or filing divider. :-P

  • Although “strong language” isn’t for everyone, your use of it and the critical comments that continue to follow it here, beautifully illustrate the message in your video. Don’t change a thing. Well done!

  • Matthew
    I’m sure you get this every single day but here goes. I adore you! I’m a 60 year old widow who has reinvented herself many times over since 8 years of age. I’ve never once asked for permission I’ve always been an opportunistic challenge and risk taker. Seven years after my beloved’s death I’m at it again! Moved 2200 miles to be where I feel my heart & soul needed to be. I couldn’t have been more correct! I love listening to you and every so often you tell me something I can really sink my teeth into. If you ever need a 60 year old woman to endorse your messages I’m your gal. I would gladly stand up and sing your praises I don’t care how young anyone thinks you are or how old they think I am. Age is a simple number. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are? Age – irrelevant!! Carry on Matthew I love listening to you and my only question is since I’ve got powerful mojo and attract men by the dozens how do I find “the one” at this stage of life? I’m not worrying over it I’m having fun however my goal is to find the kind of cherishing I had for 30+ years. I’m thinking I’ll know when he appears.

  • I think people who are mean to you, are triggered by their “wounds”. It really has nothing to do with you. If anything you’ve done them a service by letting them see what they can heal. Joseph Campbell said, “Where you stumble is your treasure.” You’ve given them a treasure. And Will.i.am sings in “Power”, “Who cares what the haters think, they hate on me cause we do what they can’t. BTW, you are adorable.

  • Wow! I am so happy for you :) it proved that doing things consistently can give you or will definitely give you results. Lesson learnt. Thank you for motivating by showing us in real how it pays off to do little things with great dedication:)

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