She Turns The Tables On Me…Watch My Reaction!

Oh God. I made a huge mistake…And now a woman is punishing me for it…on stage!

In the video you’re about to see, I’m caught in a scenario which, back when I first started as a coach, would have left me absolutely TERRIFIED and frozen with fear! After a rookie error on my part, a woman at my San Diego seminar decided to totally turn the tables and call me out, potentially leaving me completely embarrassed and lost for words in front my own audience.

For a tiny split second, my brain said what it always said in these awkward moments “Oh crap…”

Crap. Crap. Double Crap.

Luckily for me, I’ve been in this situation dozens of times before. A career of standing on stage in front of hundreds of people every week has enabled me to learn more than my fair share of Jedi-mind tricks and powerful techniques for dealing with crisis scenarios like this. In this week’s video, I’ve decided it’s finally time to open up the kimono and share some of my most carefully guarded secrets to maintaining your power in these difficult moments.

See, in life, things don’t always go the way you plan.

To Download My Secrets of “The First 5” Click Here

Free Guide

Copy & Paste These
"9 Texts No Man Can Resist"

31 Replies to “She Turns The Tables On Me…Watch My Reaction!”

  • Matt and Stephen,
    Thank you both. I downloaded this the first time you brought it out and found it really helpful. Keep bringing us more blogs and videos that apply to the parts of life outside of dating.
    Also, can you please offer your Impact package again? Some of us are ready for the next step and more in-depth communication tools.

    1. I was able to order the Impact program a few hours ago. I’ve looked at a couple of the modules already. So excited! :) I think this is really going to help me out. Matt, Thank you so much for making it available again.

  • Love love your advice Mathew! Unfortunately the sound did not work on the above video (the one in which you claim to get your butt handed to you by an audience member). Would love to watch your quick response as I am sure it’s priceless.
    Thanks for all you do….its nourishment to my relationship challenged soul :)

  • Apparently I am technologically challenged as well…sound issue was on my end.
    Great video and yes, you had a little making up to do with Tanu. Nicely executed Mathew I’m impressed.

  • Yikes! Uh oh you almost got in trouble, haha just kidding. You did handle it pretty well. It’s cool that you will be coming to L.A. soon.

  • Hi Matt, I’ve been following you for a long time and saw you post this before. I also really liked the Impact programme you created, however I found it difficult to put them into practice – I tend to get excited for a few days and then get back to where I was after that… I know it’s all about consistency so I’m wondering if you have any suggestions on keep making consistent progress? Thanks, x

  • Wonderful video! That’s a common problem For intelligent women who are usually picky but you’ve answered her nicely that I’m sure she understands what is wrong in how she reacted in your question. You should have had dated her.

  • I know this is probably gonna sound like almost every email you get. But I gotta know…

    A little about me 1st. I’m 29, I’ll be 30 at the end of the year. I’m pretty independent and have been told by most guys I date that I’m not open when it comes to expressing my feelings. Now to some degree I agree. When I was 17 I was in an innocent relationship, it was great we lasted almost 2years before we broke up. With in that time we of course said “I love you”. After that I didn’t feel the need to say it. Not because I was being mean or resentful but just because I don’t think I felt it with anyone and I’m not one to throw those words around like some fettish.

    Anyways now to my problem. Almost 2years ago I met this really great guy. About 3 months into our relationship I found out he was still technically married and had 3 kids. I of course was furious to know he hadn’t told me sooner. When I asked why he didn

    1. The first guy you made wait for years and years without sex. I take it you were raised in a churchy environment that told you to do that. Well, it’s a bad idea. The church ladies want you to keep your panties on and get a carrier and have a boyfriend and live the dream. It’s double standards, because they did none of those things before they had their spiritual epiphanies. They’re giving you bad advice, because it doesn’t work that way in real life. They don’t know that, because they never tried it. ;)

      The second guy is why you have to be so careful. That happens all the time, especially now a days. If you find out the guy’s “going through a divorce,” or whatever bullshit, run. It may very well be that he’s a dirty, dirty man who wants a little putang on the side. What’s more likely is that his wife won’t sleep with him, so he’s trying to get that elsewhere. Which means that he’ll sleep with you, and then try to make it work with waifu. Because he loves her and blah, blah, blah, even though she’s trying to use sex as a weapon. He’s in an abusive relationship. But that doesn’t mean you should have to be a part of that.

      1. You say the Christian way doesn’t work. I can say honestly it does. I have never had sex nor any kind of sexual interactions like touching of private parts with a guy. I set up the system that a guy I would date would have to get permission from my dad. I am in my first relationship and it is already headed for marriage. And if you’re thinking, yeah, just cause he wants sex.. my answer is no, because we’re going to have to wait years before we can marry.. so if he was in a rush, this isn’t the relationship for him.
        And for those who think I’ve never been hurt by a guy.. I’ve already had my heart crushed and stomped on, but mind you, only when I started straying from the will of God. He only wants the very best for his children, but he doesn’t force anyone to take what he has offered.

  • well, i think all of your advices border on flirting.. it’s very superficial…. i think i can get a guy using all your techniques but that’s only superficial… i dont see your advices for anything long term.. the foundations are not being built….

    it’s human dynamics 101 but superficially, any Arab seller knows how to do that by saying “My friend” and offering you tea and before you know it .. you have bought five rugs which you have no need for….

    basically that’s my 10 cents.. thanks..

    1. Hi. I think you should use some of these techniques and comment based on that experience. His advice in relationships, is based on meeting the other person’s needs and getting your own needs met. Contributing value to people’s lives, and asking for what you want in return. …

      I’ve been using a lot of these techniques and information to improve my relationships with everybody (my friends, colleagues, parents, siblings, and strangers!). Sometimes when the advice is gender-specific, I test it on a close family male (I might change it a little bit, but I’ve even tested on my dad, Lol! It works like a charm btw!) and then I use it on other people!
      It’s not all about flirting, trust me. Go test for yourself.
      Also, you should read Stephen’s articles on this blog, they’ve been very helpful for me as well.

  • Thank you Matthew! I catch myself still doing the same things.. I am so glad you had a real life example of how I could tweak the way I answer to make it more of a positive spin… from negative, you screwed up totally, to.. hey, don’t forget who I am, and you can make it up to me later, i will let it slide this one time. Thank you!!!

  • Hi Matt. I remember seeing this one. I think sometimes we really do get annoyed and it’s difficult to keep the edge out of one’s voice. You’re right, it’s a very subtle thing. But if you’re annoyed in the moment, well, sometimes the guy’s cuteness fails to impress. :-)

    But good point on the subtlety. I’ll keep it in mind.


  • Matthew! Stepen! Jameson! (and all of the crew!)
    Just wanted to THANK YOU. I reallly appreciate all your hard work! Just came by to tell you that that line of the 9texts …”Just had the most lifechanging burger(…)” really (truelly!!!!!) works!
    Sending good vibes to all of you from Peru (no, we dont ride lamas:D) !

  • This was a tough situation, well done Matthew! Secrets of the first 5 was very interesting and not easy, those tips are not something you can just easily apply to your life. It will take a lot of practice. The point that was missed there, was that Matt did not just show up to that interview without invitation, people were waiting on him there because they wanted to interview him. If he walked in where there was a group of people and he had to get their attention and then hold it for 5 minutes, it would have been much more difficult task to do. I am sure he would be able to do it, because he is just awesome like that.

  • Hmmm, well, yes, I think that what works for one person won’t always work for the next. I’m actually a very confident person. Like, really confident. And, I often use that same sort of self-deprecating humor that you used in the radio interview, Matt. But, what I’ve often found is that men, in particular, think I’m coming from a place of insecurity and putting myself down. Women usually get that I’m joking and know it’s coming from a place of confidence. But there’s no recovering with men. When a guy assumes something negative of you, by the time he realizes he’s wrong, attraction is no longer a possibility.

    I’m usually no longer attracted to him because after assuming that I’m insecure and like to insult myself, he’s done something so disrespectful or said something so derisive that I’ve lost all respect for him. And, quite frankly, men resent you if it turns out they’re wrong about who you are. Also, as a woman, you rarely get credit for being good at something. Men like to assume that it’s just dumb luck and anyone could do it if they just had the same lucky break. Being self-deprecating only reinforces that assumption. I think self-deprecation is more a tool for men than women. Not that my sense of humor is going to change in any way. I really only care if I find what I say funny. Still, I’m just saying.

    I think I kind of lost my point a little bit. Anyway, what you said about being millimeters off did resonate with me. I think life is best served with a huge portion of humor. Humor and masturbation are often the only things making life worth it, tbh. I often try to banter with guys like you suggested Tanu do with you. Sometimes guys banter back. Usually they don’t. Often they look at me askance and make a quick exit or take on this slight air of pity as they redirect the conversation in a more serious direction. I’m not sure if they don’t know how to flirt or think I’m not worth flirting with. Either way, they’re no fun. Sometimes they get angry because, even though I’m smiling and speaking in a teasing tone of voice, they think I’m serious. For example, if I told a guy he better make it up to me for forgetting my name, he’d think I really meant that, get his boxer briefs all in a bunch, and take all the fun out of the chat.

    I think we just need more guys on the planet like you and Stephen. And Amy Schumer. I wish there were more guys like her. What we need is Amy Schumer and Maya Rudolph in David Gandy’s body. Meh, he’d just want to date Kate Upton. Never mind.

    1. Hi Shannon,

      I think self-deprecating humour is widely misunderstood and misused. Many people go a bit too far and that’s when people become uncomfortable. I think it’s much more about giving off a positive vibe even when you are making those kind of jokes. And not being too crass as well – that’s often a turn off. If guy’s are thinking you’re serious it may be that you’re coming off a tiny bit too aggressive or they might feel like you’re trying too hard to make fun of them. It’s a very delicate balance. I think in a romantic context too many attempts at joking around in early interactions can come off as annoying or too defensive, at least in my experience, so it’s best to mix it up on having fun with him, rather than making jokes at yours or his expense.

      Hope that helps clarify a bit. All the best!

      Matt x

      1. Oh my gosh — I’m so excited that I got a comment back!!! I almost accidentally spit out my dollar store chocolate mint creme sandwich cookies. I don’t even care if my answer was from the newest journalism student intern who’s being punished for drinking Matt’s special Earl Grey from the furthest, most expensive tea making province of China.

        I’m sure you’re right, Matt. I’m coming across as too aggressive. Either I come off as too masculine or too girly and there’s no in between. I’m either talking about how much I love masturbation and my new hot pink vibrator or how much I love flowers and the color purple and fruit scented lotion (Pear Glace), and I think men get confused. I mean, not on a first date, but is there ever a good time to bring up to a guy how amazing it is to have sexy alone time with my new vibrator?

        I don’t know that I’ll ever understand how men’s minds work. Anyway, thanks so much for all your advice, Matt and Stephen!


  • Matt’s emails to my inbox have recently been like “some woman upstaged me, I was so embarrassed!” and “I’m not naturally outgoing, I’m a fraud!”

    Is he having a meltdown or somethang? That’s not good.

    1 like = 1 prayer

  • Hello!
    Greetings from Tehran, Iran.

    I just wanted to say thank you. Can I say that again?!
    Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! :D
    I came across one of Matt’s videos on YouTube in May, and since then, the amount that I’ve achieved in my personal life and my relationships is unbelievable. I’ve learned like crazy, wrote down your tips, took notes and reviewed them; Set my self reminders to review them every morning. I changed my lifestyle, made friends, introduced my self to scary social situations, some times I’ve even translated some lines and came up with appropriate sentences in Persian. I’m doing a startup business, I’ve turned in 2 papers(I’m a PhD researcher), I made a lot of acquaintances and went on dates, I’ve lost wight and got i shape, I’ve learned dancing and danced for the first time in public, I started travelling to foreign countries on my own which is something I was afraid of doing for 6 years, etc.

    Basically, I’ve been on fire since June and I owe a huge part of this success to the help I’ve got from both of you, Dear Stephen & Matt.
    I wish you a universe of joy and happiness.


    1. Hi Samin,

      Your message just made my day. It’s so heartening to hear when people have used the content on these channels to empower their lives in the way you have, I’m absolutely honoured to be a part of your incredible journey. Wish you all the best and hope you continue to thrive and flourish!

      Lots of love,


      1. Good morning Matt,
        Your response made my day as well. I’m very happy that I could have a slight positive effect on you, after all you’ve helped me with. Thank you for your kind wishes. I’m sure you’ll go on and create all the happiness you want in this world and I wish you the best in your journey as well.



  • Hey Matthew! I have some more personol privat questions to ask you, and i know you sometimes have some “i Will answar your question” om fb. The problem is, ud i vommene om it Then i am afraid of that my friends would be able to Read the comment, and ive tried to send mail into get the guy and i never get answar back.. I would like to by your stuf, but i’m from Denmark and its not possible to by it here, Maby on the net but that is very complicated i think.. Hope you wil take a little time on me someday! I am a hardworker, in a lot of ariels of my live i take time in both practising my social skills, and my talents, but i am in Big trouble now..

  • haha I loooved this video. And even the advive you give her after, is one i wont forget.
    I´ve used some of your advice from time to time. And the one i loved the most is when a guy is movin in a diretion Im not ready for I can say things like ” you know what it sound really nice, but its a bit to early for me, but i would love if you to invited me out for coffe like thuesday next week” or something like this.. IT WORKS…:-)

1 2

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

All-Time POPULAR Posts