3 Ways To Stay Sexy While Arguing

In this week’s episode of LOVELife I talk about how you can argue in a charming manner.

I put forward the idea that you should strive to be respected instead of likeable, and share 3 tips to help make that happen.

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8 Replies to “3 Ways To Stay Sexy While Arguing”

  • This video was a revelation!

    “1. Don’t get emotionally involved
    2. Create segways not dead ends
    3. Divorce the concept from the individual.”

    I’m pretty sure, like 98% sure, that thanks to this piece i can break a huge reference point i’ve had no power over.



  • Wow that was totally for me, I mean I just love to have a good argument, I’m passionate about it, sometimes can really turn me on when someone disagree with me, i just hate people who agree in everything it’s just boring… I like the irony and the sarcasm, it’s just part of me… That tips will really help me out. Tnhak you!

  • That was fun. I’m person number 3. I love learning new stuff. And it keeps your brain sharp. :-)

    I also like your guests’ reaction from being admiring you to looking truly worried about you. LOL.

    Jameson is totally like Hobbes from Calvin and Hobbes. Except someone has to move that tripod!



  • I usually try not to be too personal once I write on here but:-
    I have put a lot of thought into this topic over the years and personally, your third point is absolutely one of the best advice yet: “divorce the concept from the individual.”
    (Remember the H. Kingsmill quote.)
    Up until now, I would treat arguments differently depending on whether they were family – or friends and colleagues. Hence, this was one essential missing piece to my puzzle, regarding this topic when it comes to family and respect.
    I erred in the angle of approach all along: in an argument, I had thought that the family-relationship would prevail over the issue, as the former one would be the one with a “constant”value. And therefore, I thought that one should “relativise” the “element” and not the relationship. It’s actually a relief to know I was wrong, not because you convinced me, but because I have failed to see this side of approach and now have a new terrain to work from.
    As for your first point, I always say that the key to a liveable life is to -Be detached but stay profound.
    I think it makes even more sense now :) Big thanks!

  • Hi Matt!
    It was great for me to read this this morning after a big disagreement with the female friend I brought to your show yesterday at the 02.What I believe that this actually does is allow arguments to remain as disagreements so that one doesn’t become emotionally invested!
    There is nothing worse than the feeling of entanglement in a situation because of the way somebody else has carried on.
    What annoyed me yesterday was that this person seems to have no regard for the concept of due diligence or manners.
    She got up during your video towards the very end of your show (the one about uour retreat program and decided she was done and wanted to leave while you weren’t done talking. We didn’t need to rush for a train bit had planned to go somewhere else a 6pm. I felt as though it was very childish of her to get up and go and wait for me outside which put pressure on me to get up (while you were still talking pick up some retreat application forms and go to see if she was alright..rather than stay put and enjoy the end of your presentation.
    I know that this person has their own self confidence and other issues and knew that I needed to communicate gently about what was going on with her basicallly ending up having to leave the building to passify her anxieties.
    I was angry and annoyed that she was not taking what you were presenting seriously and wanted to leave to just simply go and bum around London with no particular purpose. Then she ended up getting her bag caught in tube door and not listening to my attempts to try and work out what she intended to do or go while we could have either continued with our original plan or waited to see the end of your show! Now I could blame this on you or the O2 for starting late or running late and ruining my plans!..Or try to make the best out of a bad situation.
    Actually what I decided to do was try and make the best out of the bad situation but still had a crazy argument with my friend.
    I ended up having to walk away from her and just go and get on my train …leaving her to find her own way to the station! Shocking!
    The trouble was dealing with my feelings of anger and disapointment that had towards my friend. I actually spent the train journey home talking to a chap I had never met about it and feeling better for getting things off my chest!
    Then when I saw my friend (she had got on the trakn I was able to feel sure that I was not only justified in feeling how I felt about what had happened but also emotionally less involved! By the time I made contact with the friend I felt alot better about what had happened although still completely peeved that this shocking situation had occured and seemed to have completely ruined an incredible day and the beginning of the new year!
    I had not been able to hold my ground and stay til the end of your presentation .I felt angry and annoyed!
    What I was able to do was not take this too personally and learn major lessons from it! I woke up this morning thinking I will NEVER invite that personANYWHERE again!

    1. continued….
      Meanwhile I think.that is important to say here that I don’t really hold this against the person. I absolutely loved the event, I had chosen to invite her because I knew that she would really benefit from getting a handle on the concepts and I was the one who got up to go and see if she was alright at Wthe end of the day! I have to take full responsibility for the choices that I have made and perhaps think alot more carefully about the people with which I choose to spend my precious time! Not being there while you finished off your presentation was rude and I would have loved to have sat there until the end but that simply was not to happen!…I am having to evaluate and re-evaluate wcontinually what my priorities

      1. …ooops continued again…

        what my priorities are!
        Should I really blame her for how she behaved when I had invited her!
        …and in view of arguments….how to stay sexy while arguing!
        Well I think that I can say for sure that I definately own this, being able to remain composed throughout!

        So Matt this is a sorry for or leaving your presentation without giving you my number! ….and next time please try to finish your shows on time!…. lol

        ps. what I actually enjoyed about the day was that the show was so seemingly informal, you having your family members there and I especially loved it that you were personally able to talk about an earlier time in your life when a girl you liked turned you down and that she was actually there in the audience!
        I actually talked to her in the toilets and she told me that she was older than you at the time which made it awkward at that funny age when girls seem to mature faster than boys!…she also told me that she completely regreted it now of course which I thought must have been an awful for her! x

        Denia x!

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