Wait Or Create – A Reader’s Story #2

In the last couple of days I was sent this story by one of our newsletter subscribers, and I had to share it with you. This is a true example of someone who:

a) Is willing to get proactive, and
b) Has the right peer group around them.

I hope reading this will inspire you to go out there and take big steps in your own love life.

Matthew xx

(Times Square – Photo Credit: Arne Bornheim)

From Stephanie:

Hi Matthew,

Just had to tell you and your team about this – I’m a Brit living in
New York and a few weeks ago one of my fellow brits living in the UK
who travels to NY a lot was telling us all about your weekend seminar
and retreat that she attended. We were so interested the next time she
came over (which was yesterday) we arranged our own brunch and got
together with our brit friend and your new book.

The aim of the brunch was to have a “focus day” to introduce ourselves
to “Get the Guy” (we had fun pretending it was a “corporate training
away day” with a fake agenda etc., it was hilarious). We had a great
girly open discussion about our fears and aspirations with dating and
our friend referred to some of your techniques in the book. We were
“focused”, sober and ready to take action.

This is why I’m writing to you because we couldn’t believe how quickly
things happened – and we know you’d love the “feedback” from our
“focus day”, lol!

A couple of us went to the bathroom (for champagne and a chat – very
NY, lol) and one friend was left at the bar waiting for us – she used
the “mobile phone” tip and when I went to find her, she was surrounded
by 3 guys chatting away. I couldn’t believe it! So the rest of us
joined her and we were introduced to another two guys who had just met
at the bar – this was hilarious – we hadn’t even left the restaurant
and 5 women were with 5 guys, chatting, engaging, being invited to the
theatre next door that night because one of them was the director etc.

As we were on a “focus day” , we made our polite excuses and left to
the next venue – a huge bar full of guys! Within minutes, we were onto
our next task “ask a guy a question” at the bar – so one of us said
“hi, we’ve just had brunch and we don’t know what to drink next, what
would you recommend?”. This led to a hilarious exchange and guy was so
happy he wanted to buy us the drink, in his words “you are a lovely
group of ladies”! The guy sitting next to him who was a stranger
joined in and again, we had another great exchange. Total result.

We moved onto the next venue and walked in to a place with about 15
gorgeous, well dressed guys in a pack – this was quite a challenge,
all that testosterone together in one room, ugh – these were the “good
looking” guys that we wouldn’t ordinarily approach, especially in a
pack – this was a classic situation! We were on such a role, the
adrenaline was pumping and at one point we got a bit hysterical and
had to calm down, it was so funny. When we “re-focused”, we started
the strategy of slowly breaking up the group and sure enough, we got
talking to them. A couple of the guys turned out to be rather
unpleasant on this occasion which was a little unfortunate so we made
a polite exit and left – but it was still a total result!

Undeterred we went onto our final venue which we couldn’t get into so
we decided to go for a “calm down” drink – this was 11 hours later so
we’d done pretty well – and we were still sober, lol!

As we reflected on the 12 hour extended focus day, we just couldn’t
believe what had happened. Our mindset had totally shifted and now we
all feel we can go out and put everything we’ve learned into practice
on our own. We’re going skiing next weekend and we’re taking your
book with us, lol! In fact, we’re all going to buy it – we can’t wait
until April!


Stephanie – beaming on a Sunday morning, ready to go out to my local
coffee shop and get started… lol!


I hope you get a lot out of the story! I love hearing these kinds of tales from readers, so if you do have an experience to share (good or bad!) be sure to send it in.

Here are a few quick updates to wrap up…

1) If you’d like to get the book…
To pre-order your copy of the GetTheGuy book so that you can go out and have this kind of experience for yourself, head over to Amazon.com and grab your copy.

2) Come and see me LIVE
If you would like to combine your pre-order of the book with tickets to come and see me LIVE on the GetTheGuy tour, right now there is an early-bird offer whereby you only have to buy two copies of the book to get your seat. This offer expires at midnight tomorrow (02/28/2013) so be sure to click through here and register now.

3) Not in the US/Canada?
Fear not! You can sign up for my online training programme The Man Myth in which I tell you everything you need to know about the male mind. I have male ‘Casanovas’ come clean in hour-long interviews with me, and I show you how to build chemistry with the guys you like quicker than you ever thought possible. Click here to find out more.

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20 Replies to “Wait Or Create – A Reader’s Story #2”

  • Hi Matthew,

    I got ur book in my iPad straight after publishing and learnt a lot from that! After a week I got approached by A LOT of men and now out of the blue a REAL MAN pursues me, spoiles me and thinks of me like a Woman he has never met before… I really feel like a Spoiled Princess!
    Because I use the mindset of the high-value woman, smile a lot, I am happy with my life aaaand “I want a man in my life but I don’t NEED one!”
    All my life I was called the Ice Queen- completely unapproachable, coy etc… And now?! I am so happy, the mating game is a real joy regardless of my look! :-)
    You opened a new world to me, I am sooo grateful!

    Thank you!!!!


    Beatrix from London

  • What do you do when you really like a guy who seemed to be interested at first, then all of the sudden he doesn’t have time for a relationship yet he wants something else from you, (if you know what I mean)

    I told him I’m not like that, he can’t even take me out on a date “because he doesn’t have time with school, work and other stuff” yet he wants that from me?? No.. I wish I could have a real relationship with him but he’s just not cooperating.

    1. Dear Desiree,

      If he does not want a relationship, he does not want a relationship. As a high value woman – which you are! – you will not go after him begging for one.

      There are 3.5 billion men on this earth. The right one is probably just around the corner.


    2. If he hasn’t got time for you , you don’t have time for him….move on be open to the one who has got time !

  • totally agree. proactivity and peer group ;). it works in any area of your life. I remember we created a job-hunting peer group some time ago, we were supporting each other, sharing our contacts, it really pushed us to remain proactive.
    anyway, I wished I had such a great peer group for going out…but I don’t! and I am seriously desparate, my friends suck in this, they are just lazy during w-ends, don’t wanna go out. any tips on how to find the right peer group? workplace is not a good answer btw, I work in logistics – so a lot of man around (unfortunately not the ones I’d be interested). thanks for any advice!

  • Hi Matthew,
    I am very surprised that your book has not been published in South Africa. Is there a reason for this? or will eventually get here?
    Thank you

    1. Hey! It has… It was out at Exclusive Books a few weeks ago! Since then it’s disappeared but that may just be cause its sold out and they’re ordering more or something..?

  • So loving this story.

    Wish I had a peer group though.

    But for now, this just proves that you are THE MAN that knows what he is talking about.

    xxx La Toya

  • Dear Matthew,

    Your program has really inspired me to become a more social person. All throughout high school, I’ve been very focused on grades, and my mulitude of activities. I had a group of friends, and I didn’t really branch out from it. My one long term relationship came from this group of friends. My senior year, I kind of woke up. I realised I wanted more. And your program has helped me achieve more. I really haven’t taken that many new risks, but I forced myself to leave the house, and go places. I ended up meeting a very nice college boy while volunteering, and I’m smitten (he is too!). I was the only one out of my friends who had a date to the dance, and I’m so happy I found this program. Thank you for everything!


  • I purchased the book and I’m hoping one day I can meet the guy behind this remarkable life changing work! I’m a single parent and since I read and put into practice on get the guy, I have been promoted, can talk to anyone, and has totally changed my life…. thanks Matthew you’re my hero!

  • Hi Matthew,
    What is your opinion on age differences ? Older woman and younger men? Should the man always be the older one? I would just like to know what most guys think and your professional opinion?
    I don’t mean just a year or two. I met a guy at a dance and we both lied about age. He made himself 2 years older and I made myself 5 years younger ( I have always looked younger, people quite often mistake this) We thought we were only 2 years apart when in reality it was closer to 10. We ended up dating for 2 years before we broke up. I want to make sure I do things right this time, it’s been quite awhile since then.

  • Hi matt, this is completely off topic but I want your advice on accepting my bf’s mom being a prostitude, and his dad passed away because of cancer. I know everyone has a past but I don’t know if his childhood affects who he is now, creepily. We’ve only been dating for a week and he told me this after we’re official. I have no idea how to tell my parents about this. My family is quite conservative. What should I do? I’m afraid that he’ll turn out to be weird later. So far, he seems to be grateful of what he have in life because of his experiences. Btw he have adoptive parents and have a stable job. He treats me like a princess. I’d love to hear from you. Thank you!

  • Hi Matthew,
    I really want to say i’m so sorry for not commething on your blog so long.
    now i feel really guilty about it. l was really bizzy with school and internship and That my parents gonna divorce Maybe they are in relationtherapy.
    But since i heard That i feel dead inside i know That sounds kinda weird but i’m feel like i live because i live you know.
    One question how can i handle That problem better.

    Really Thanks for everything Matthew haha your my coach on the other Side of the world ;) Thanks for everything your a Awesome Guy ;D

    Lovely Greetz Thirza

  • I like the story. I bought the book a qouple months ago and I’m also a member in the get the guy program online. I love the programm and Matt you saved my dating skills, before you I was in a very insecure place (altough I’m a good looking girl) and had absolutely no idea how to handle dating. Now I have options :))

    And I quess I missed it, but what is the mobile Phone tip??

  • Wow!
    What a story!
    Its a shame I haven’t got a keen enough group of supportive girlfriends that would be willing to try such a “focus day” approach to kick things off!
    But I’d Love to do something like that. I’d love to find him…

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