What happens when the person you trust most becomes the source of your deepest betrayal? In this week’s new video, we explore the shocking Netflix documentary Unknown Number: The High School Catfish, where a young girl discovers her relentless bully is someone she never expected. Using this real-life story, we unpack the concept of “betrayal blindness” and the devastating effects of narcissistic behavior.
If you’ve ever struggled with betrayal or felt trapped in a toxic dynamic, this video is for you. Together, we’ll unpack the emotional fallout, the tactics used by narcissists, and how to reclaim your power when someone close to you has caused deep pain.
My partner is a diagnosed Narcissist,everything you have said here,is all I have been through and more ,
Dr Ramini has validated a lot of what I was going through and I’m not going crazy,thankyou Matthew,this was so good.
Thank you. I’m having trouble processing my own mother’s betrayal. I believe she is a narcissistic sociopath. For years when I was a child she pulled me into her and my father’s chronic fighting. She treated me like I was her best friend (keep in mind I was only 7 or 8 years old when the deep brainwashing started), confiding in me about how horrible of a person my dad was to the point where I no longer had a relationship with him. I’m now 48 years old and 2 years ago she confided in me that she was having an affair with our neighbor’s son for 5 years while all the fighting and chaos was going on. This was literally the cause of most of the arguments that she pulled me into to defend her. She tried to make my dad out to be a jealous rage case the entire time because he was sure it was happening and he was right all along. When she was done telling me about the affair and how she didn’t regret it because they were “in love”, she concluded by saying, “I feel so much better now getting that off my chest” and I was left dumbfounded and furious. I said, “you don’t get to feel better. You destroyed our home and our family and now I have to have some difficult conversations with people I hurt in your defense”. Not only that, my sister has deep emotional issues and mental illness as a result and all of us (my siblings and I) have complex PTSD and are struggling in all of our relationships. The damage she has done is immense and now she’s turned my own son against me. I don’t know if I can ever forgive her. She is a rotten human being.
Than you matthew, I just divorced from the father of my dauther, who is narcissistic and finally after your video I’m felling supported.
Thanks so much Matthew this is such an important message and I’m so pleased and encouraged that you have brought it to the spotlight. I was in a marriage for 20 years before I realised I had married a narcissist. I managed to get out though having three kids meant haven’t managed no contact. So control over seeing the kids is the trauma I currently am dealing with. I started a new relationship after 18 months he seemed fun, helpful and supportive, very different to my previous partner so I thought I was safe 2.5 years in and when my mum got very sick with cancer he finished it. Another narcissist! One day talking about when to go on holiday, next morning it’s over ! Four months later I’m trying to heal again …
Our mothers sound like monster sisters. Mine cheated on my father and stole valuable jewelry items from his family and he found the diamond ring and returned it to his uncle. She was living rent free in one of that uncle’s apartment rentals in NYC She was pregnant with me and they made her leave. My father got a room for them to live in. She got cheating again after I was born with his best
friend .Then she kidnapped me and ran back to her family spreading lies that father had beaten her for no reason.He best up the guy, not her. He caught them together at home when he was supposed to be at work. She made it impossible for him to be with me from lies. She told me as a child that he abused me as a baby I was 9 months old when she ran away with me after she got again. She turned my son against me through undermining me as a young parent who was 18 when he was born. I had to live with her. She left him everything as though he was her child.She gave me to relatives to raise at 11 months old and she came to visit me maybe 3 times a year sometimes less as I grew up. She played mother to a boyfriend’s 3 kids and never came to get me as she always promised. She future-faked and bread crumbed a small child with no empathy or intentions to have me in her life. She could have left me with my fathers family who loved me but she want to hurt them more than let me possibly have a stable life with a parent who wanted me. She never did My son idolizes her because she gave him whatever he wanted. He didn’t have worry about consequences around her. She did this behind my back. When I got married and moved away he was 4 years. I fought really hard to undo the brainwashing and spirit of rebellion that took riot in him from being around her. I was never successful and I lost both sons because I unfortunately married a narcissist and the damage just continues. Both husband and mother are deceased but their poison lives on .
Wonderful video, and I appreciate the fact that you explore deeper psychological involvement in human relating. That it isn’t just basic dating advice, but rather a health bible on human relating, I was dating an autistic guy for two years, and he appeared lovely and nice, everything one could possibly want. However, things changed, and I was basically invisible to him; my needs, my interests and my emotions were laughed at, and he simply erased me or dismissed me. In desperately attempting to make sense of my experience, I originally thought it was NPD. Then I studied the link between autism and NPD. Whilst online platforms speak out about how great neurotypical and neurodiverse relationships are…people should realise how immensely abusive they can be, also as the individual you are engaging with has no empathy. I understand online searches say they do. My ex told me I was an object to him, if I cried at his treatment, he gaslighted me into thinking I was insane and a bad human for having emotions. He expressly stated he had no feelings for people nor cared. It was one of the hardest and most destructive periods in my life and took me years to recover sanity from it. You should think about addressing this in a video
I haven’t watched the documentary yet but I am shocked that the mother is permitted to communicate with her daughter from prison. There should have been a restraining order for life!
The mother is not only a narcissist but also a psychopath.
My biology mother is diagnosed with borderline personality and also is narcissistic in my opinion. I disconnected with her at the age of 23. I’ve seen the documentary and didn’t understand the reaction of the daughter. Thank you for explaining and sharing.
I extracted myself from a relationship that caused me both wonderful feelings and lots of pain. Because the good was so good I tolerated the blame and other abusive treatment for way too long. After I left, it took me 3 years to stop thinking there was something I could have done and that it was all my fault. I now know it was not my fault and learned signs to watch for so I could be better at discerning behaviors and aligning to my own inner compass.
This is the first time I am making a comment.
I extracted myself from a relationship that caused me both wonderful feelings and lots of pain. Because the good was so good I tolerated the blame and other abusive treatment for way too long. After I left, it took me 3 years to stop thinking there was something I could have done and that it was all my fault. I now know it was not my fault and learned signs to watch for so I could be better at discerning behaviors and aligning to my own inner compass.
Thank you, Matthew, for sharing this video. I’m praying so hard for that young lady. I’ve been estranged from my BPD/narcissistic mother for 23 years since I was 29 years old. When I told her I was pregnant with my son Daniel (who’s now 23) and was going to marry the father (whom I was married to for 21 years–we divorced in 2024) it caused me so much emotional damage and years to heal, but so much hope. Daniel and I broke a generational trauma bond. I, too, wanted to repair the relationship with my mother and seek forgiveness/reconciliation, but the more I cared the more she lashed out. She also triangulates. For instance, when my father died last year, she emotionally/financially blackmailed my younger brother into not telling me that he died–I only found out my dad died through my brother’s new third wife (my brother is also a narcissist and enmeshed with our mother). A few days later, my mother got to her and punished her for telling me. The only way my sister-in-law was able to redeem herself to my mother was to send me a text that was so vile, my own therapist didn’t even believe it was real.
I lived in Raleigh, NC, when this happened and everyone except a few close friends and my husband couldn’t believe my mother could be that bad–it had to be MY fault. It’s taken till now, 23 years later, to be almost healed–I moved across the country to California to forge a new path in my life. My aim right now is to write a memoir about narcissistic abuse and my mother to help others.
The immense betrayal of a person you love and trusted blindly, leaves you with life long emotional scars. Every day is a battlefield to cope with the C-PTSD symptoms and the mistrust to others, who potentially might hurt you. Therefore you isolate yourself and your life quality equals zero due to anxiety, loneliness and depression. And NO ONE can help you! My mother had an alcohol addiction and I was severely emotionally neglected. The love of my life turned out to be a man, who I lived with for 7 years hiding he was bipolar and a sex addict frequenting prostitutes. Back on my feet after this horrible betrayal, I get catfished by a narcissist, who after 1,5 years suddenly discarded me out of the blue. I didn’t know at all I was in a toxic relationship again. Now I have been single for 7 years and face liftetime loneliness. I feel broken beyond repair.
Yazdığınız yazıdaki bilgiler altın değerinde çok teşekkürler bi kenara not aldım.
I just like the helpful information you provide in your articles
Bu konu hakkında bilgi vermeniz çok güzel. Genellikle türkçe içerikler az oluyor fakat böyle güzel içerikler görmek ve okumak çok zevkli.
naturally like your web site however you need to take a look at the spelling on several of your posts. A number of them are rife with spelling problems and I find it very bothersome to tell the truth on the other hand I will surely come again again.
Matt – you always provide some of the best content on the internet when it comes to dating and understanding life as couples. Thank you
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I’m often to blogging and i really appreciate your content. The article has actually peaks my interest. I’m going to bookmark your web site and maintain checking for brand spanking new information.
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