We can all learn a thing or two from Gatsby.
If you’ve read the book or seen the film, you know that Gatsby threw crazy, opulent parties where hundreds of people poured through the doors.
Here are some of my big takeaways from the story…
1) Why throw parties
If you’re the person throwing the party, everyone knows you.
The person throwing a party is someone we call a ‘hub’.
You become everyone’s common point of conversation, you’re the favourite topic for people to talk about, and everyone gets to know you better through their discussion.
The great thing about being a ‘connector’ is that by putting people together, people want to reciprocate by helping you out and doing you favours. You become important in that way.
2) An alternative to becoming a ‘hub’
With that said, you don’t have to be the one throwing the party all of the time to develop a network.
What you do need however – if you’re not going to be the hub – is build a good relationship with a hub.
If you know the person throwing the party, you always have a way to go and meet people.
You can then use this person as a gateway to meeting more and more new people.
3) Have an emotional vision for life
One of the things we know about Gatsby is that through all of his achievement, he had an extremely emotional vision of where he was going.
I’m always coaching that if you want to get somewhere, you can’t be driven by logic.
Logic doesn’t last. Logic leads you to running on will-power and will-power never lasts.
You have to run on emotion. You have to find something that drives you on a visceral, gut level.
For Gatsby it was a woman. It was the ideal he had in his head – and of course that become an unhealthy ideal because it became unrealistic – but he had something driving him that was bigger than an amount of money or the size of a house. It was a VISION of his life with somebody.
We all have to find an emotional vision that’s going to drive us through the hard times.
4) Believe you’re destined for greatness
Gatsby believed that he was destined for greatness, even as a boy.
You have to believe on some level that you’re destined for great things. We all have to believe that we’re special in our own way.
–What makes YOU special?
5) Have a plan
Gatsby had a way of constantly improving himself and saw himself as his greatest asset.
(In the book) His dad found a journal with his daily diary.
Schedule Sept 12th 1906
Rise from bed – 6:00 AM
Dumbbell exercise and wall scaling – 6:15 – 6:30 AM
Study electricity etc. – 7:15 – 8:15 AM
Work – 8:30 – 4:30 PM
Basketball and sports – 4:30 – 5:00 PM
Practice elocution, poise and how to obtain it – 5:00 – 6:00 PM
Study needed inventions – 7:00 – 9:00 PM
General Resolves
–No wasting time at Shafters
–No more smoking or chewing
–Bathe every other day
–Read one improving book or magazine a week
–Save ($5.00 – crossed out) $3.00 a week
–Be better to parents
Have things that act as a compass for how you live.
If you’re thinking about this when you wake up, it’s already too late.
This has to done the night before so that when you wake up, you’re straight into action and you know exactly where you want to be.
Now Gatsby had his flaws. But I feel like we can all learn something, even from flawed men.
When we take his best parts and combine them with the learnings we see from a far, that’s when we’ll achieve our own form of greatness.
Question: What did you take away from The Great Gatsby? Let me know in the comments below!
Lol Love ya!!
Ha! Thank Keira : )
That look on your face!!! He he heeeee lol you crack me up!
How many shots did you take till you took that last photo?
LOL it was actually water in the glass. The amount I had to drink during those takes I would have been on the floor if it wasn’t!
I was wondering the same thing.
Thanks Matthew your advice coming just the right moment when i was feeling sad and stressed about things. i was just cleaning our house i always do when i feel that way. i think om not over that my grandpa is passed away on februari 11 2012.
i know i’ts a year ago but when it was happend i was only 14 years old now i’m 15. and i still miss him everyday :(
But Thanks For everything your website Your New tv show Ready for love i just love it :)
Thanks you make my day a little bit better.
Greetz from the Netherlands.
Hey Thirza,
I’m sorry to hear about your grandfathers passing. We all experience losing people we love, and though that doesn’t make it easier on you, I can assure you we know your pain. It gets easier, I promise.
Always here for you
Matthew x
Thanks so Much for commething :) i know it’s gets easier but it depends On the day when i think about my grandpa. I really appreciate That you tool your time to answer Thanks So Much <3
Lovely greetz From the Netherlands.
I don’t know how you didn’t do the beginning (with the drinking the cocktail) and the sigh at the end, I would’ve killed myself laughing! :-)
: ) x
Great reminder. Great video.
Thanks, again!
One of my favorite all-time books, too.
PS. You have a terrific sense of style.
Thanks Nofyah.
I’m a big fan of the book too.
Thanks for coming back regularly to the blog. Loving that you’re here each time.
Matthew x
I love your video :). Sending you some love from Toronto.
Sending you love back.
Thanks Jacqueline.
Matt x
yea that’s right, i think im special because i dance for example and i have this energy!! but then a guy comes and tells me haha what’s special about u? what do u have that others don’t?!! he drives me crazyyy!! and this challenges me a lot btw! Mathew you really inspire and i am always needing your advices!!thank youu
Glad to be inspiring you Zahra.
You have to know what makes you special first. Don’t allow someone else to dictate it. And remember, not everyone will see what’s special in you (in fact most won’t, or won’t want to), but that’s ok too. That’s what separates the people you should be around from the people you don’t need to be around. Those people that think you are special become friends, lovers and amazing contacts. Everyone else just doesn’t ‘get it’, and that’s cool ; )
M x
Wow, great reminder. I feel like printing this last coment and put it in the wall of my bedroom.
You are intrinsically special just because you exist, you have your own existence and there is only one of you. Your dancing and energy are just ways you manifest how special you are.
If you were in an accident and no longer to dance, you would still be special, but you would need a new way to manifest it.
So funny !!! Great tips btw!
Thanks Anna! x
Was that a lemon tree?! Sunshine, yellow tie, yellow things on a tree, yellow flowers…great color scheme! The info was good too of course :)
haha first person to appreciate the color scheme, love it!
Thanks for being here Erin x
Looked like you had fun doing this! Good advice as always; best get to work on improving my plan. Love your high hair quiffy thing going on ;)
Hey Clara,
I DID have fun doing this. If you can’t mix things up once in a while then what’s the point?! More and more I’m looking to get creative, silly, spontaneous in the ways I present the information to you. All the same things I ask you to do in your love life ; )
Mx
I’m exhausted just reading this.
One step at a time Francesca : )
Thanks for commenting!
M x
I love the great Gatsby, read it as a kid and just loved his drive and determination. I used as an emotional botton even before I knew such existed.
Looking handsome there Matt.
Love
Helle
It’s an emotional button for me too Helle.
Appreciate the compliment. x
The jacket was more Miami Vice than Gatsby. :P x
I’ll take it : ) x
This video helped so much!! I was in the crowd behind you when you got interviewed for Extra in New York and just from that I have learned so much from you!! I also love Ready For Love! You’re amazing!
Thanks Caitlin! So great to hear from you. I LOVE that you’re now following the blog after being there in that interview.
Got some great stuff coming for you in the next couple of months.
Speak soon
M x
It would have been even more awesome had the camera pulled away and you weren’t wearing pants. That would have been quite hilarious.
The beauty of hindsight Kimberly. I knew I’d missed something in this video.
x
I was thinking the exact same thing. My other thought was perhaps bright green trousers since that was the only bit of the landscape you didn’t match, Matt.
She must have watched Hussey Uncut last month!
P.S. That comment I just made might sound weird to anyone who didn’t themselves watch Hussey Uncut and who might not realize I’m just referencing a story you told!!!
Hey, we can all learn a thing or two from you!!!
Thanks.
Silvia
Well thankyou Silvia : ) x
OMG, so much style in the last photo, LOL. Now, please, sing and dance “The Girl FROM Ipanema” with that face.
Thanks for coming back Rumors.
Had I known this was a request beforehand I would have made it happen.
M x
Well, now you can use this feedback for your next video :D
Thanks to you to keep updating this blog.
thanks! great video!
I watched the movie and it made me stop compromising and waiting based on other people promises. I am now changing this in my life.
Great to hear that Irene x
Very Creative! Loved it! Keep up the Great work! It’s been awesome so far.. Not only learning a Lot about love and guys, but seeing your career evolve is very interesting and fulfilling in a Way as well! :)
Last Night for the First Time I was REALLY aware of your Videos and techniques and Thanks to you could really easily Tell my Friend was into me! Proximity is definitely Key ;) Thanks a Lot! Love you and your work!
That’s so great Sandy! Happy to see you are making progress in your own life.
I will always help in whatever way I can. Feel privileged to have you as a supporter on my journey. I’m there for yours too.
x
New to the site but loving the videos, defiantly can learn a lot from them, just watching whilst having a martini myself and hoping they can help an old 40 year old out!! Lol x
Welcome Claire!
We are happy to have you here! We have such an amazing, positive group of women here (which you’ll see by the comments). I’m sure you’ll find lots here that can help move you forward.
Enjoy your martini ; )
Matthew x
Thanks and really nice to see you reply personally x
Brilliant as always, Mr Hussey! I love that styling too but your insights are the most important part. One question, what if you have been driven by an emotional vision and then find that it is no longer inspiring but rather making you stressed and unhappy? I’m not sure if it’s the gap between the reality and the dream, or just that the dream is not really fitting anymore… I have just decided to let it go and see if I can either create a new vision or strip back to the essentials and find the inspiration again from the old one.
There was a nice comment on twitter from a guy who said “never confuse love and success”, which I think is brilliant – we can get caught up in trying to capture that vision in all its grandeur, when perhaps what we really desire is something far more simple… those are my rambling thoughts for the day, thanks and cheers!
Hey Rio
When a vision becomes depressing it’s usually because we’ve lost any sense of it becoming a reality. So it just becomes something we can’t have.
Take the part of the vision you are excited about, and scale it down to a size that you can see as possible for you in the next 6 months. It will inspire you to take action again.
We don’t need big things to happen to be inspired, we need progress. That is all.
Thanks for commenting.
x
Hey Matt,
Thanks for the reply, you are so spot on in this – that stripping back to re-find the essence and bring back the joy is exactly what I am doing! luckily I have two months in the french pyrenees to achieve clarity, before getting back out into the melee. I really appreciate how much of yourself you reveal, and sharing the tough parts of your own journey is making a big difference to me in terms of finding my own way and being able to let myself be vulnerable -in public and private. Thanks again for all your fantastic work, you are truly a gem amongst men! xo